Tuesday 30 November 2010

Darwinism

There was not a lot that could be done to make Morpork a worse place. A direct hit by a meteorite, for example, would count as gentrification.
-- (Terry Pratchett, Pyramids)

Luck... Is a curious thing, sometimes the defining factor in a successful hunt, or embarrassing loss.

I'm sitting in my hangar, trying to figure out a fitting for a Worm frigate when an associate starts yelling on comms

"THANATOS UNDOCKED FROM GUS STATION, FUCKING HELL HE'S WARPED IN THE DIRECTION OF THE STAR"

Excitement almost getting the better of me, I calm myself and ask her nicely to follow him

"WARPING AT 100 CLICKS"

I quickly board a Bhaalgorn named Ghetto, I would need a few of its abilities for this.

"THANATOS OFF SCAN"

Bugger must have cloaked because he still appeared on the local register.

"DROPPING PRO... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK THAT'S A BIG SHIP"

By chance, my friend in her tiny Cheetah Covops decloaks the monstrous Thanatos.

"GET HERE QUICK"

Alright woman, calm down, stop shouting, I'm... On... The... Way!

Ghetto undocks from the station and I set warp as I enter the black, I land a few clicks off the Thanatos and proceed the basics of tackling.

Lock... Check

Warp Disruptor... Check

Dual Web... Check

Guns... Check

Drones... Check

Energy Neutralisers... Check

Everything now in place and the Thanatos locked down, I start to make arrangements for escalated negotiations.

The Thanatos has me locked up and dispatches a group of fighters in my direction, Keira is busy getting ready to deploy as I start making some calls to like minded individuals who may be interested in a nice sit down with the Thanatos pilot.

I hit armour as Keira undocks the NovaKane Incorporated flagship, an Archon carrier named ArKane and initiates warp to my position. Gang is forming, slowly at first but then invites start flying as the locals come out to party.

Keira lands with my Bhaalgorn almost at 50% armour, she locks me up and sends some remote armour repair love my way, a deployment of ten Fighters spews forth from the ArKane and start multiple attack runs on the now stricken Thanatos.

The tank of the Gallente designed carrier isn't doing very well, but then he probably has zero capacitor left at this point to run it, with a massive explosion, it breaks apart, the escape pod warping out rather sharpish from negotiations as the pilot had logged his critical systems...

...But he didn't get too far as my associate probed it down and punishment for such cowardice was exacted with extreme prejudice.

A lucky kill for my friends and I, an embarrassing loss for the luckless carrier pilot.

Monday 29 November 2010

It's not the size of the man in the fight, but the size of the fight in the man

"When it's time to stop living, I will certainly make Death my number one choice!"
-- (Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent)

My day started off with two successful hunts, one a Hurricane running an anomaly and another, a Ferox in a belt.

But...

Those were just the hors d'oeuvre*

A Rupture undocks from Gusandall station, an associate reports this and I board a Rupture of my own, hastily undock...

Why does this always seem longer when there's mischief to be done?

After what seemed an age, I undock just to see the Rupture warp to the 4th planet, I hastily engage warp, to zero.

I burst out of warp right on top of my prey and engage, tackle is go, guns are go, drones are go...

JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEED!

Motherfucker, ec-300s full cycle and the Ruppie pulls range very quickly, must be one of those fancy shield Ruppies, a Vagabond warps in, a corp-mate of the Ruppie pilot, he engages, I try to close on the Ruppie...

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS, 450m/s? WHO THE FUCK PUT AN AFTERBURNER ON THIS MOTHERFUCKER?

That who would be me, admiral dumbass, as I last used this ship chasing a mission runner and forgot to swap it out.

I'm unable to close on either of my attackers and wait for the inevitable...

TO EXPLODE, SO I CAN GO FETCH ANOTHER SHIP TO EXTRACT DELICIOUS REVENGE!

I warp my pod out sharpish and dock at the station, there's only one thing for this kind of situation, Flubber, y'all know Flubber right? My Stabber Fleet Issue is particularily suited to this kind of fight and I undock as fast as I can, even as I'm being fed intel via an associate that the two are still at the planet.

I warp to zero, they're still there but a good forty to fifty clicks away, I hit my MWD but set it to 50% thrust, Rupture is first to bite, he engages but keeps range nicely, I hit full thrust, overload and soon I'm humping the Ruppie like a pitbull on Viagra.

Rupture isn't long for the universe as he tastes defeat, I turn towards the Vagabond just as I spot my MWD blink out from overheating...

OH BRILLIANT, WELL FUCKING DONE KANE, ARE YOU RETARDED?

Right, stay calm, change of tactic, this Vaga is going to chew you up if you don't redeem yourself.

I make as if I'm trying to run, I'm deep into armour, about to hit structure, no MWD, I overload my scrambler and webs...

Vaga chases, a little too keenly, one web, two webs, Crazy Ivan, scrambler, Flubber licks the Vaga and the race is on.

My structure is evaporating as I burn the Vaga's shields, I lay waste to his armour and with the smallest of margins I win the race, the Vagabond explodes.

EIGHT PERCENT STRUCTURE

Eight percent is all that stood between me and a second loss to these guys, eight percent and Flubber would have said her goodbyes to the universe, perhaps never to see the like of her again.

But Kane Rizzel has sweet revenge...

I also got most my loot back :D


*An appetizer served before a meal

Tuesday 23 November 2010

Two Thousand

Jaime had never realised that trees made a sound when they grew, and no-one else had realised it either, because the sound is made over hundreds of years in waves of twenty-four hours from peak to peak. Speed it up, and the sound a tree makes is *vrooom*.
-- (Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens)

I'm sitting here trying to figure out how best to write this up and to be brutally honest, I'm at a loss. The fight was short and violent, like most fights but nothing about it stands out as a defining moment in my EVE career.

There's three frigates in my home system of Gusandall, a Vigil, a Rifter and a Kestrel. The three pilots appear to be unaffiliated but that's not always the case.

I grabbed the Cunning Man, once again rebuilt after his forebear was brutally slain.

I undock from Gusandall station and initiate warp to the first belt, The vigil is there and it locks me up, I return the favour but wait. The vigil engages as the other two frigates warp in.

Primary is the Rifter, everything is overloaded and the Rifter explodes in short order, Kessie is hitting me hard and is next on the block, it too doesn't last long and the Vigil is a wreck in the blink of an eye. The Cunning Man is in structure but only just, standing proud amongst the wrecks.

The Rifter piloted by Ishtarion Greyhawk was my 2000th kill and I'm glad I was flying the same class of ship that I got my very first ever kill.

Masquerade

The more interesting fight of the night came in the shape of a Wolf class assault frigate. It was loitering outside the station and I grabbed one of my favourite ships, an old and proud Stabber Fleet Issue, particularly suited to engaging small ships.

Shortly after undocking, I locked the Wolf up, he returned the favour, I activated my MWD but held back a bit, 0nly 55% thrust applied, I do this for a few reasons, for one it gives the appearance that I'm slow, plated, which gives the aggressor the feeling that they can out run me, and get under my tracking, it also forces the engagement as the aggressor then feels confident enough to engage.

The Wolf did exactly what I wanted him to do, he engaged, but he quickly shot out to around 20 clicks... Arties? Surely not

But he was hitting me nicely from range, so artillery it is. I hit the MWD again, full throttle, I'm faster than him, overloaded stasis webifier reaches out and slows him down further, just as I get in range of an overloadedwarp scrambler which shuts off his MWD. The time had come to hammer the nails in, a flight of Warrior II drones spews forth from my drone bay, my guns had been hitting but not doing a whole lot...

...And then it was all over.

He warps his pod out sharpish as I offer GF in local, to which he doesn't reply.

Saturday 20 November 2010

Service with a smile

Mustrum Ridcully did a lot for rare species. For one thing, he kept them rare.
-- (Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies)

Attacking a ship and engaging in Piracy is not as easy as lock and pop, as I've mentioned before there are a lot of little things to consider, but it's not often you think to yourself "Kane, you might not have enough ammo for this"

The Cunning Man, a Rifter class frigate, has been rebuilt and like many of his class before him, he is lean, mean and ready for action. In familiar territory he stalks the black sky, Eifer his hunting ground and a good hunting ground it has been.

A Hurricane appears on scanner, quick and efficient use of the directional scanner concludes it is not in an asteroid belt, but is close to planet V, it appears to be running an anomaly. The onboard system scanner starts a rather long cycle but eventually it reveals a solid hit on a low class Angel anomaly. Again, using the directional scanner, the Hurricane is pinpointed in the direction of said anomaly.

A Hurricane is not the best prey for the Rifter, even a semi competent fit would be enough to chase the Rifter off, but, there is always some idiot who hath not a clue, there is always someone who braves low security space unprepared for what lies beneath. This particular pilot is young, far too young to be flying a battle cruiser into lowsec.

I warp into the anomaly and land about 29 clicks off, need to close the distance sharpish and get under his guns but maybe if I'm sneaky he won't notice me amongst the rats.

Kane can be very sneaky, sneaky as a sneak with a Masters Degree in sneaking from sneaky university if I must and I saunter over to the Hurricane. I lock him up and introduce myself.

"Hi, I'm Kane and I will be your Pirate this fine evening"

I open up and he engages right back, the fight is on but I'm easily orbiting under his tracking and I dispatch the three medium drones he launches with ease.

Suspicions of low skills confirmed, but even then, I still have to kill this thing... And kill I must as he refuses to answer the phone to be ransomed.

Now, there's a twist!

There always is...

I treat my Rifters like disposable razors and as such carry a single load each of Barrage and three flavours of Faction ammo for my autocannons, I also carry two loads of rockets. In most situations this would be enough for any fight I'm involved in...

By the time I'd run out of RF EMP I was starting to get nervous as he was at half shields.

I'd broken his shields and got him to about 75% armour by the time the RF Fusion ran out.

RF Phased Plasma took him to half structure, I'd run out of rockets but don't stop me now.

With Barrage loaded and my guns about to melt he explodes brilliantly.

I had a few offers of help, but I declined, I was riding solo. I had a few offers for ammo to be dropped off, but again I declined because solo is solo.

Yes his fit was a joke but a kill is a kill and you'll never know what's inside the piƱata until you give it a whack.

Friday 19 November 2010

[OOC] Can it be done?

"Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time."
-- Bursar 1 - Hex 0
(Terry Pratchett, Hogfather)

Someone over at Ars Technica's gaming forum aka Gaming, Extra Strength Caplets' EVE online thread asked this question

What I'm trying to ask is if a mostly solo PVPer can enjoy Eve?

This was my reply:

Solo PvP/Piracy is very viable but you have to be dumb as me to enjoy it :)

Edit: To expand a bit, solo PvP/Piracy has been the single most challenging and rewarding gaming I have ever taken part in. It takes a lot of skill to be successful and a fuck ton of luck, you also rely on your opponents being dumber than you are (Which is not actually that difficult)

Starting out you are going to spend a lot of ISK, to the point of bankruptcy, you will get frustrated at the lack of targets and the fact when you do find a target, you'll get blobbed, more times than Oprah's been to the buffet table.

You'll roam countless systems for days, sometimes weeks, without nought to show but a pretty light show when you click 'systems visited' on the IG Map.

You'll eventually find someone, go through the mantra "Lock, scram, web and unleash hell" only for him to warp away, get used to it, also get used to screaming "STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABS" like Kirk shouts "KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN"

You'll find a lone frigate in a belt, you'll engage him, he'll engage back, you think you have a fight only for him to decloak his Falcon alt and jam you, till you die, he'll then type GF in local as you warp your pod away.

You'll find a fight, a good fight, where every thing goes perfectly... And it fades to black.

Solo PvP/Piracy whilst frustrating and difficult is the pinnacle of EVE PvP, in my very humble opinion. It's ALL about the hunt, being able to use your scanner effectively, being able to narrow down a target sharply is one of the key skills you'll need to learn and it can't be taught, you need to practice, practice, practice.

The other key skill is patience, patience, patience and just when you thought it was over, more patience.

There's a reason I've been so successful, there's a reason that even though I've been out of game for extended periods this year my BC rank is still under 230.

The reason...

After almost four years of soloing in EVE Online...

I'm still an idiot

Kane Rizzel > you know it's bait, everybody know's it's bait, even the bait knows you know but he still wonders why the fuck you're attacking... and that my friends is when you have the upper hand

Also, it is good sometimes to have friends, just saying :)

I apologise for my absence recently but I've been out enjoying my hard earned leave with flashes of Real Life™ and Black Ops.