Going Postal™

"I believe it's very hard to have fun in Iceland without fish being involved in some way."

-- Looking for a good place to party (Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead)

Painting the system red

Going Postal™ is once more out in Eifer, it's pilot eager to kill something. The usual array of haulers and travellers passing through but nothing of note. The Rifter's primeval scanning equipment shows a Griffin on scan and under the expert direction of the pilot warps into the belt. The scanner is still doing its rounds as it picks up a Vagabond, Going Postal ™ lands in the belt and engages the Griffin but is interupted by the Vagabond, the Rifter's warp engines fire up as the pilot takes the smart option and leaves well enough alone.

The Vagabond leaves but the Griffin is still about, quite obviosuly bait for the heavy assault cruiser.

Going Postal™'s pilot is no fool, well sometimes he's a little too cavalier for her liking which has resulted in many of her kin meeting with a sticky end but he's no fool. She's glad she has such an accomplished pilot, not many of her kind have been so fortunate. He has fitted her with the most high tech gear he could find and is always taking her out on epic adventures.

Local comms shows an aquaintance of her pilot had entered Eifer and he's in one of her kin. A few minutes later another aquaintance popped in flying a Vengeance, the pilots spoke in a shared intel channel as the Griffin appeared back on scan, the Vagabond was back in system and a plan was hatched, spring the trap and engage the Vagabond.

Going Postal™ was ready, this was her reason for being and her pilot was just crazy enough to pull this off.

Griffin was engaged in the belt by the other Rifter and the Vengeance, Going Postal™'s scanner waiting for the moment the Vagabond entered the belt, aligned to insta warp in and go to work.
The Griffin popped just as the Vagabond appeared on scan, Going Postal™ fired her warp drive and was instantly launched into the belt. She landed right on top of the Vagabond, pulsed her afterburner and settled into a nice easy 5km orbit. The other Rifter and Vengeance were already engaging the Vaga, his warp core and microwarp drive scrambled, his speed halted with stasis webs. Going Postal spun up her guns and rocket launcher. The Vagabond launched drones and the other Rifter was slightly too slow to react as he was chewed up by the autonomous drones. Going Postal™'s pilot knew well enough to start targeting the drones, the Vengeance followed suit and soon they were all killed, back to the Vagabond who was now a sitting duck, his guns too big and slow to cause much harm to Going Postal™ as she rained down sweet death upon it.

After an epic few minutes the tank of the Vagabond was broken, Going Postal™'s pilot gave an almighty roar as bits of Vaga rained down on her, Going Postal™ loves the rain.

Mad props to Jorge and Hallan from The Bastards for the epic kill

The Bastards

The Bastards are a great crew based a few jumps away from me and I've been honoured a few times to be invited to fly with them. Tonight as I was sitting in Gus station basking in the afterglow of the Vagabond kill I got a call from them asking if I wanted to take The Fifth Elephant™ out for a spin. They had scanned down a Maelstrom, Myrmidon and Hulk in a system right next door to Gus. Unfortunately they found the quarry to be in a mission/hidden belt so I asked my friend in her covops to go have a looksee. Soon after entering system she had dropped a snoop probe and after three scans got a hit on the Hulk, she warped in at range as not to get decloaked and started to try and get us a good warp in. Unfortunately there were loads of wrecks and drones all over the place so she got as close as she could without getting decloaked before giving us the go ahead to warp in. The assembled gang jumped in and soon we all landed not far from the Myrmidon and Maelstrom. The Hulk was too far away but the other two were already tackled, Myrmidon was primary as the smaller ships tried desperately to get in range of the Hulk but were too slow as the mining barge warped out. No matter, the Myrmidon and Maelstrom would have to do and they did nicely, both being destroyed with out breaking a sweat.

As the gang was going it's own way, a Drake and Myrmidon were reported one jump out, on the gate and engaging, we all rushed on over and introduced the pilots to some good old fashioned lowsec violence. They went down so quickly I barely had time to take note of their names.

I headed back to Gusandall, content with a good nights hunting. Thanks you Bastards, was awesome fun

When the mad man is grinning... It's time to go

"Nac mac Feegle wha hae!"

-- (Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum)

"Suprise"

"A Republic Fleet Firetail you say?"
...

"In my plex?"
...

"Of course I'm going to bloody kill it"

News of a faction frigate reaches my ears, the very fact it is from a faction makes it a very tempting target and one which I can not and shall not refuse. Normally in this kind of situation where there are trespassers in the local 2/10 I would grab Maurice™ my Jaguar plex hunter but I felt like playing with my quarry and took Going Postal™ for a spin in the black.

I undock and warp to the gate, hitting the scan button to make sure he's still there, I land on the gate and activate it, get launched deep into the plex and wait the agonizing seconds until I land.

He's not in the first pocket, damn. It's at this point I realise I made a mistake, I had no keys for the deeper plex gates. So... I warp to the station, dock, grab some keys and undock.

Wash, rinse, repeat.

Except this time I head towards the second gate and activate it, it launches my Rifter into the second pocket, I don't expect to see the Firetail there as he'll be moving on to the third pocket, I make a beeline for the gate, activate it, all the while mashing that scan button in the direction of the third pocket. He's in there alright and about to have a nice suprise.

I burst out of warp with the Firetail about 40km away, I curse my luck but no matter, afterburner glows as I start to close. The distance closes very quickly as I notice the Firetail is coming for me. Most excellent, not what I would do if I saw myself coming towards myself but I imagine his thought process went a bit like this:

"Oh look, a Rifter. How'd he get in here? He's all flashing red, oh look, a bounty, that's nice, I could do with some ISK, I'll just kill him and carry on in here"

Now, his first mistake was not warping out as I came in, his second mistake was engaging me. This is what I wanted and I think if he saw my mad grinning face in my pod he would have not made either the first or the second.

Once in range of my tackling gear I locked him up and activated the scram and web. Now that he wasn't going anywhere I punched the guns and rocket launcher and they started to have their way with the Firetail. The rather beautiful ship, in my eyes, no match for the sheer awesomeness of my Rifter. The Firetail exploded, raining bits of debris against my hull, it brought joyjoy feelings to my black heart but I was not done. The pod was locked and scrambled and as I was in a good mood I opened comms with the stricken Pilot.

"5mil and you can go on your merry"

"OK" he replied and a quick glance at my online banking showed he deposited the required amount in to my account.

"Have a nice day" I said as I disengaged.

I docked up and got ready to go out, I was going Ice Skating

You wouldn't believe the things I have to do to get a fight?

Had a great time at the ice rink last night and had spent most of the day doing things that needed doing but I was ready to take Going Postal™ out for a spin. I headed to Eifer and warped to my usual spot and proceeded to scan. There was a Rifter about so I started the hunt, I narrowed him down to the V cluster, warped to the planet and started scanning the belts. He was at a safespot as none of my small arcs found a hit at a belt or moon, so I warped to a belt to see if he would try and hunt me.

Negative on the being hunted scenario but have no fear, a Thrasher has warped into the first belt.

This was going to work out nicely I thought to myself, grinning at the prospect of a combo meal. I warped into the first belt and as expected was greeted by the Thrasher, he was 30 clicks away but no bother, I would just mosey on over and introduce myself. I engaged the Thrasher with all the violence my Rifter could muster and soon he was in danger of exploding, it was at this point my cunning plan bore fruit as the Rifter warped in and engaged me.

Awesome, I finished off the Thrasher as I locked the Rifter, who was closing fast, my tackling gear switching to him as soon as the Thrasher exploded.

"Let's dance my friend" I said to no-one in particular as the Thrasher pilot warped his escape pod out of the belt. Rifter vs Rifter, the truest test of a pilots skills and abilities. Unfortunately for the pilot of the other Rifter, mine have been honed in combat for years. The very thought of combat, win or lose is what I live for, the hunt being the blood that drives my heart.

The Rifter hit armour, my shields long ago having been stripped by the Thasher.

"Good armour" I thought to myself as round after round, rocket after rocket smashed into it. This guy was either really skilled or had an oversized armour plate. No matter, more armour just meant more fight and boy was I having fun.

But like all things in life, good times must end and for my opponent it must have been demoralising as his ship exploded in a beautiful firework display, his escape pod being locked and scrambled before he had a chance to react, waking up in a cloning vat is not pleasant but best he gets used to it now.

I scooped all the loot and my trophy corpse and warp to a safespot to wait out my Criminal timer, a mad grin across my face as a cunning plan works out beautifully.

I head back to Gusandall pleased with my nights work, short, but oh so very sweet.

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES COME ON!

The world is made up of four elements: Earth, Air, Fire and Water. This is a fact well known even to Corporal Nobbs. It's also wrong. There's a fifth element, and generally it's called Surprise.

-- (Terry Pratchett, The Truth)

This is my Broadsword, let me show you it

Lights flicker to life as I enter the hangar, seems Keira has neglected to move loot again but no matter, today is not the day to worry about such minor issues, today is a day to celebrate.

I look over my array of ships and pick a Rifter, time to pay a visit to Eifer. My head is a bit tender as I just had some new implants installed into this clone and they kind of dulled the senses but that too will pass, I was eager to get out into the black and do some old fashioned Piracy.

Eifer was dead but news had come through of a Megathron in an adjacent system doing a mission. I hurried back to Gus to grab Guards! Guards! my Broadsword. It is a well known fact that many lowsec mission runners fit warp core stabilisers and nothing ruins their day like a Broadsword to the head.

My friend in her covops was dispatched to probe him out as the gang was forming. She got a hit with her first sweep and had soon vectored us in to the mission gates. Yes, that's not a mistake, there were three gates going in different directions but she used her on-board scanner to determine he was in the direction of the Alpha gate. I jumped in and warped to the gates, landing 17km from the Alpha gate I activated my afterburner and closed as the rest of the small fleet assembled flashed out of warp.

I activate the gate and... Nothing, an automated message appears on my HUD saying it is locked and requires a special key to activate. Damn, what now, well the other two gates were clear of wrecks and we assumed he'd have to return here to use them so we had the covops and a recon stay put as we left system or warped to deep safespots.

News of a Fleet Issue Tempest in Gusandall got the pulses racing as the small gang, hungry for a kill closed in, he was trapped and was soon collared at a gate but made the mistake of aggressing before jumping, making it now impossible to get away as we tore him apart. It wasn't a very memorable fight but a kill is a kill, we didn't even have a chance to ransom as his armour and hull vaporized under our assault.

Meanwhile, in a system right next door the Megathron had returned so I made all haste to get back in there. It seemed he had docked for a while but our scouts reported him back on scanner, I got into position in system and waited for him to warp in. Our scouts gave the call as he warped in and I initiated warp of my own to their position. Warp trails streamed off my Broadsword as my systems showed I landed right on top of him. Tackling systems primed in warp went active as my lock resolves.

Kane Rizzel > hello there precious
Zenithil > Hi
Zenithil > You guys willing to trade?

Mmm, he wanted a ransom so it was offered and we each made a nice little bit of ISK for our trouble. We left him to his business and went on our merry. I returned to Gus and checked in at the station but was soon back out in the black as a Maelstrom was tackled on the Gus gate in Eifer, I raced there and we vaporized him as he didn't answer the ransom request.

Apparently I can't solo two Ruptures

Back in a Rifter and back in Eifer I had scanned out two Ruptures, not in the same spot but definitely together as they were in the same corp. I warped in to where one was and engaged, I had taken his shields out as his friend came in and my Rifter didn't last long, I warped my escape pod out towards Gus as I was going to fetch Flubber™, my Fleet Stabber. I came back and they were bouncing safes so I offered a 1v2 which was never answered. I really wanted revenge for what they did to my wonderful Rifter.

Falcon, meet Flubber™

News comes in of a battlecruiser being engaged in Gusandall and I make haste there, I jump in just as it all kicks off and a rather sizeable gang engages the local Pirates. They had a Falcon and I made a beeline towards it, it was my only target and the thing I wanted to kill most. As I burned towards it, his friends opened up on me, along with the sentries as I had a GCC from my fight against the Ruptures.

Just as I was about to get into warp disruption range he warped out and the rest of the locals disengaged as the hostiles outnumbered and outgunned us. I warped out and docked, setting my hangar crew to knocking out the dents in Flubber™

Roaming Bastards

I get a call from my old friend flashfresh who asks if I want to go on a T1 frigate roam with him and The Bastards. Hells yeah I do, just let me get a new Rifter set up and wait out my GCC and I would be right over. Fellow blogger Mynxee was in gang too along with some other Hellcats members, an honour to fly with the female Pirates of the verse. All in all about 17 assorted frigates to cause havoc amongst the stars.

I headed out to where they were waiting and after a few minutes we set out, not much in the first few jumps but eventually we found a Harbinger Ratting. The swarm of frigates descended on him and proceeded to violence his boat, to such an extent it exploded. His corpse was liberated from the confines of his escape pod in the blink of an eye.

We ran across a Hurricane in the same system and he too met with a sticky end.

Bouncing around we eventually tried to engage a flashy red Abaddon on a station but he docked, more from fright as his overview filled up than any damage he was taking on his massive armour.

Then came the icefield in Oddelulf. A Jaguar and three destroyers engaged us and were all destroyed although we also took some losses.

The roam ran out of steam at this point and I decided to return home and see what was about.

Vexor meet Flubber™

I get a call from my friend in her covops who says she just busted a safespot of a Vexor cruiser. Flubber™ gets another spin in the black as I undock and warp to her position.

I burst out of warp a few clicks off him and close the distance, my lock has already resolved and the warp disruptor is glowing a satisfactory green as it pulses and makes sure he doesn't get away. He's up for a fight as he returns lock and closes, web, scram and drones are set upon Flubber™ as my guns blast massive holes in his armour. He has energy neutralisers and vampires painting a pretty picture across Gusandall's dark hues but it doesn't last long as his armour fails and shortly after so does the structure. Good fight is shared in local comms as he warps his escape pod away from the carnage.

So what's with the celebration?

I sit back in my deck chair in my hangar and reflect on a rather good day, made the more merry by the fact this is my century of blog posts. It's taken a while as I'm not as prolific as some of the other bloggers out there and sometimes my stories might not capture the imagination but I try my best. Over eleven and a half thousand visitors have viewed these stories and whilst it might not compare to some of the more popular blogs, it sure sems a lot to me, not sure why people would want to read about my adventures but it seems to have a following.

As I was writing this I was notified of trespassers in our local 2/10 plex, a Wolf assault frigate and a Coercer destroyer. Maurice™ my Jaguar was just waiting for such an opportunity and I quickly boarded and undocked. Making all haste to the plex gate I burst out of warp hammering the scan button in the direction of it's trajectory, they were still there. Activating the ancient gate I was launched into familiar territory, trails of warp streamed off the Jaguar's beautiful hull as she lands right on top of the Coercer, guess it was primary as the Wolf was 30clicks away. The Coercer was going down hard as the Wolf closed, I did the same and as the destroyer was destroyed I switched tackle over and proceeded to introduce the pilot to the colour of his liver. Another trophy for "The Morgue"

I scoop the loot and dock up. Need to take some painkillers as these implants are hurting a bit.
I light a celebratory cigarette and make myself a cup of tea.

It's good to be the King :P

Check out flashfresh's blog for his Pirate blog speedlinking, a one stop resource for all things YARR!

RIFTER GOGOGOGOGOGO

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.

Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

Aah, Eifer... No other system in the verse has brought me as much joy and loads of frustration as her. I was sitting in my usual spot watching the traffic go by on the local comms net when I spotted an Intel channel flashing


Aiko Shinjiro > hrond 6-1
Aiko Shinjiro > gogogo
Aiko Shinjiro > navy mega
mandaro > hrond 6-1 go gog og
Kane Rizzel > omw

I burst out of warp on the Gusandall gate, activating the massive structure as soon as the last trails of warp evaporated off my Rifter

Aiko Shinjiro > with fighter support fyi
Kane Rizzel > I'm in a rifter, he stands no chance

I broke gate cloak in Gusandall and whipped Going Postal™ towards the Hrond gate, straining metal filling my ears as she fought the turn.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Good to hear your voice again sweetheart. The short warp to the Hrond gate feels like forever as the anticipation builds, I just hope I have something to shoot at by the time I arrive. Once again I activate the gate as soon as I land and hit warp to the belt.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Kane Rizzel > inbound
Kane Rizzel > AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY

Moments later

Kane Rizzel > told you
Kane Rizzel > corpse is mine YARRR

The Navy Megathron was dispatched even with the presence of two carrier's fighters and the quick lock of my Rifter made sure his corpse would become a meat popsicle.

I returned to Eifer to see if any other unfortunate souls would be about and set about making a Cormorant pilot very uncomfortable, so much so he left the system in a flash of his own pod.
Sometimes I'm a bit too ruthless but I suppose that's like saying a star is a bit too hot.

I head home and dock up, it's been an interesting evening, introspection and destruction. I light a cigarette, take a deep breathe, put some tunes on the HiFi and lean back in my chair.

All I need now is a good nights sleep.

Kane shuffles his feet

A learning experience is one of those things that say, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'

- Douglas Adams

The voices in my head no longer talk to me, they just talk amongst themselves but I can still hear them.

It's not always easy flying alone in the dark. There's danger around every planet, death lurking in every asteroid belt and that's just me. Now imagine everyone else.

Every now and again I question if what I'm doing is the right course for me, whether being a solo Pirate is right for me. It's times like this I have to weigh the Pros and Cons of my particular brand of violence. Now I will state first and foremost I will remain a solo Pirate, it's just that the voices in my head sometimes argue that I could achieve so much more. Unfortunately I doubt that will happen and I'll just keep harassing the locals and interlopers to my little corner of the universe.

I've seen what my friend flashfresh has been achieving with the Bastards and it leaves me in awe, he recounts the most recent awesomeness here, bringing you right into the fight. That's some hot action right there as a fleet of frigates decimates battleships and support. That's the kind of action I'm looking for.

Anything can be achieved with numbers and the right mindset. Not every corp is like the Bastards though and flash did well joining their ranks, in fact I think it's the Bastards who did well by recruiting him more than anything else.

Me? Well, I prefer the freedom of being solo, not having to commit to anything I don't want to, able to determine my path amongst the stars as an independent pilot. Like I said it gets lonely but I have Independence chat channel where I can shoot the breeze with like minded individuals. The channel was created by flash when he still operated solo, what a long time ago that seems but it has become a sort of home for me and others who have at one time or another lived in the Gusandall pocket.

Time is the worst place, so to speak, to get lost in...

The loot hangar has been cleared and the ISK from my endeavours has helped the wallet along. Keira has been busy moving things to market hubs. There's a spring in her step, the massive Archon carrier that now dominates our hangar a huge achievement for her and I'm proud of her determination to train and earn it. She made all the ISK for it herself, none of it was taken from my wallet or that of NovaKane Inc. When she first approached me with the notion of getting a capital ship I said "YOU WANT WHAT?" But to her credit she knuckled down and earned the ISK, studied rellentlessly and now I can't stop her grinning.

For me personally there's nothing new on the horizon, I've spent my time studying to perfect certain skills. Many changes have occured whilst I've been on my sabbatical and it'll take me a bit of time to adapt even with the amount of testing I'd done on the Singularity and Multiplicity simulation servers. Not so much to the speed changes, while I held a few speed records, I never used speed as my main tactical advantage but the suicidal ability to get eye to eye with my opponents and slug it out.

The times they are a changing and we need to change with them.

The EVE universe is a harsh mistress and I look forward to introducing people to just how harsh she can be.

I leave you with some local chat flavour

Halkdaff > Hey, Kane Rizzel, soon I shall come for you!
pvp god > mwhahahaha
Aiko Shinjiro > uhoh we are in panic
Kane Rizzel > planet 1, 5 minutes... OK?
Halkdaff > Not so it is fast, but time will come.
Kane Rizzel > ok, well I'll be here, come back soon
Kane Rizzel > bring cookies

Upon entering C9N w/3 Vigils and a shuttle during the BoB/ASCN war 2006:
Mobile Oak > you're going down!
Jonathan Xavier > 100M or pod
MrDetermination > drones are cheating, man
Theris Elistriter > wait...aren't we using drones?
Mobile Oak > economically I think we still win
Hey You > rofl
Hey You > how so?
Mobile Oak > you wasted tech 2 torps to shoot us
Tovar Milendis > In the game of life we are all winners.
Jonathan Xavier > each precision cruise cost more than my
shuttle :)
Mobile Oak > bye now!
Mobile Oak > fly safe!
Theris Elistriter > o/
Hey You > lol
Hey You > laters
Tovar Milendis > Keep this up and we'll bleed BoB dry!

Guess who's back?

He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which.

- Douglas Adams

Something wicked this way comes

It's a curious thing... Space. The allure of the darkness and the ability it has to consume your every waking moment. It's really dark in space, well, except for all the light. Oh boy the light, the agent dispatched to help with tonight's operation shields his eyes as his systems go off-line, the sheer amount of energy to do what he just did totally incapacitating his ship.

The Cynosaural Field is used to move ships too big to jump through regular stargates. Months of preparation and training had led to this moment as Keira jumped the massive Archon carrier into Gusandall for the first time. The NovaKane fleet has a new flagship.

I always said I will never fly anything bigger than a Command ship but Keira had spent so much time training to be an epic command pilot she decided to move it up a gear and spec towards Capital ships, mainly because she could and partly just to annoy me, at least that's the way I see it.

Interesting times ahead :D

Back with a bang

mandaro > EIFER GATE GUS NOW NEED DPS

Not the most eloquent of requests but short and to the point. What did they have tackled, what juicy treat would welcome me back into my world? The one place I'm truly at home. Which poor soul was having a bad day? Guess his day was about to become decidedly worse.

The Fifth Elephant™ slides effortlessly out of the dock and enters space... It's been a long time but it's like breathing, it's just natural. I engage warp towards the gate and head on in, only intel I've gleaned is that the unfortunate pilot was flying a Charon Freighter and he refused to answer the ransom offer. I entered the fray in the only way I know how, guns a blazing and soon the Charon would join the endless debris in space. Empty and no ransom but a welcome kill for me personally, a nice easy and relaxing way to ease myself back into the darkness.

It's good to be back