A Thief in the Night

"You won't get away with this," said Cutwell. He thought for a bit and added, "Well, you will probably get away with it, but you'll feel bad about it on your deathbed and you'll wish -- " He stopped talking.
-- Cutwell tries to reason with the Duke of Sto Helit
(Terry Pratchett, Mort)

The Hangar is cold and dark, the low hum of slumbering giants a white noise to block out all sound, an eerie stillness to the air, almost suffocating.

It's been a long time, a layer of dust obscures the console, I wipe the dust away and check the hangar systems and inventory "Yep, all as I left it" I think to myself, but something is not quite right, someone has been here. As power is restored to the hangar, the lights high in the vaulted ceiling start to flicker to life, slowly illuminating the caverous hangar.

As light slowly pushes back the dark I see tracks in the dust, someone has definitely been here. I follow the tracks, towards my old Rifter, The Cunning Man has been the ship that defined me and to a large part I defined the Rifter, back in the day, when frigate Piracy was a vibrant and wonderful thing.

I board the vessel and immediately see someone has been messing with the systems, modifications have been made, and I don't like what I see. There's a note on the fitting console, it reads:

"I made some changes, took away the utility high cause let's be honest, who needs a utility high, and I made adjustments to the lows, you can now fit an extra low.
You're welcome
Fozzie"

I don't know whether to scream or track down this Fozzie and strangle him with his own tongue, or both at the same time. I know I haven't been around for a while, but don't touch my stuff.

The utility high was the only thing that gave the Rifter parity with other frigates after they were boosted to not only match the Rifter but to superscede it as the premier tech 1 frigate.

When the Rifter was good, it was oh so good, able to catch and brawl Interceptors and Assault Frigates in the 2/10 of Gusandall, to hunt down cruisers and battlecruisers in the belts of Eifer and generally punch above its weight in the right hands in all sorts of situations. The Rifter was Godly if piloted well, but it was never really that overpowered that it deserved this.

Maybe this Fozzie was indecently assaulted by a Rifter when he was a young Capsuleer, or maybe he's forgotten what it's like to be a Capsuleer. I suppose we will never know.