Operation Farmer Smash

"ER...HO. HO. HO."

-- Death makes a career move (Terry Pratchett, Hogfather)

Damn, how drunk was I last night? Way too much bourbon and shooters to be healthy is for sure but hey, I had a great time at the pub.

I decided to go play with my favourite Raven pilots next door in Ingunn. My covops friend was already in place and it wasn't long before she had two mission sites probed out. I brought the Pilgrim and went about spreading xmas cheer in the only way I know how.

Highlight of the evening was the first kill on Pissonp, I had killed his Raven, he came back in an Ibis, a few friends were in system, I tackled it and a Disco Dominix came in and popped and podded him. Much laughter was had on voice comms.

Five Ravens and a Thorax later I decided to try and get some shut-eye, might get some dinner later.

I've decided to name my little adventure against the ISK farmers Operation Farmer Smash

Happy holidays everyone.

A Farmer's Tale

The trouble is that things never get better, they just stay the same, only more so.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Eric)

Take Two

I'm not normally vindictive but when I am it's probably best just to leave system.

Last night was such a night and I only had one thing on my mind, killing Pissonp as many times as I could. Well, my original plan was to get him to eject from a Raven but that didn't go down too well so it was down to killing him.

My friend in her covops had scanned out a Raven in Ingunn, I received the call and boarded my Pilgrim, a ship I was really starting to enjoy flying and a good challenge to use going up against a Raven. I joined fleet with my covops friend and headed over to Ingunn, jumped into system and hit warp to her location. She had patiently set up the warp in but she relayed to me as I was in warp that a scout had arrived on the gate. All I had to do now was hope the acceleration gate wouldn't decloak me as I landed. Unlucky for me as it did and the scout definitely spotted me because as I burst out of warp, having cloaked again, the Raven headed back to station.

Not really too worried about him turning tail and legging it, I patiently waited, cloaked inside the mission, he'd be back.

I waited for a good hour or so as he did a few other missions in system, I knew he'd be back as his scout warped to this mission a few times to check things out.

Nope, nobody here besides us sneaky, cloaky types, nothing to see, move along.

After a few more minutes the scout warped to the gate again, my friend relayed the info and said the scout warped into the plex, I confirmed he was inside with me and then she reported the Raven landing on the gate.

"Excellent!" I thought to myself.

The Raven landed 7 clicks off my port side, I waited a few seconds, savouring the moment.

I uncloaked, target lock resolves, scram and web go active, a bank of energy neutralisers glow green on my HUD. He returned lock and launched a volley of cruise missiles my way just as I released a swarm of Hammerhead drones in his general direction. They bit into his shields as my Pilgrim rocked from bow to stern from the missiles impacting its shields. Armour hardeners and damage control go active, I set the armour repper running whilst maintaining a tight orbit with afterburner glowing in the Ingunn night sky. His shields fail and I open up a convo with the pilot.

Pissonp > no
Pissonp > Let me complete the duty
Kane Rizzel > eject or be destroyed
Kane Rizzel > this is not a negotiation
Pissonp > Was me to give you raven
Kane Rizzel > that's the plan

I gave him my terms.

He chose... Poorly

I was left alone in conversation and carried on assaulting his ship, Grand Theft Raven™ would have to wait for another time. Cap Booster charges were being consumed as I continued to rep armour, but soon his Raven was a smoldering wreck, bits of debris raining against Kumano-San-Zan. His escape pod barely made it out before the lock resolved but I was satisfied with the loot he left.

I recloaked and basked in my own awesomeness.

Interlude

Noz gave me a call as he was hunting Pissonp too, he had scanned out an Armageddon, had it tackled and asked if I wanted in?

"On my way" I said.
"It's Disco" he replied

A smartbomb Geddon would be tricky for me but I would just use my energy neuts to cap him out and set drones on him, it didn't take us much time to explode him.

Not long later, a call from a pilot in Independence channel piqued my interest.

"Freighter tackled in Gultraten, on Ingunn gate, need DPS"

Well now, how could I resist? I warped on over and jumped into Gult where Nozaro was engaging the Obelisk freighter in his Broadsword, as luck would have it the Freighter was blocked from crawling back to the gate by a Concord Billboard :D

I smiled wryly as I engaged, knowing full well I would be losing drones to sentries. Sentry fire was shared between Noz, myself and my drones but eventually we downed the massive freighter but were disappointed to find it empty of any loot. But still, a kill is a kill and a freighter is a big one.

Take Three

I headed back to Gusandall to repair what drones I had left and re arm with some new ones before heading back to Ingunn and the mission plex. Pissonp would be back and I wanted to be there when he did.

I shot the breeze in Independence before falling asleep in my ship, cloaked in the plex.

Hours later I was woken up by the sound of explosions, I was expecting this and it makes a change from the horrible beeping of an alarm clock. As predicted, the Raven was back, 15km from me, I closed the distance under cloak.

Decloaking in range of warp scrambler I locked and opened convo with my prey.

Rejected :(, Oh well, Grand Theft Raven™ was put on hold as I resumed the routine of making his day that little bit more interesting. I set a flight of Warrior drones to intercept his Hammerheads as volley after volley of cruise missiles battered into my recon, my armour repper and cap booster keeping up as my energy neutralisers sucked the life blood from the Raven.

Then my moment of "nubness." In my haste to get back I neglected to reload on cap boosters and I had just run out

"DOH!"

Well, now it got really interesting as Pissonp got clever and started on my drones, this gave me the respite I needed to really pay attention and the game of "Scoop and Redeploy" started. As he missiles hit a drone I scooped it and redeployed. He would then target another and launch a volley at it, wash, rinse, repeat.

My Hammerheads were doing an amazing job of chewing into his armour and hull as we played but eventually he ran out of both as he exploded in a violent flash of light.

Damn, that was actually close, a damn good fight and I must give props to Mr Farmer, good job, awesome fun.

I scooped the loot and warped out, I returned to Gus but not before warping back to the mission gate and dispatching the scout for good measure.

I docked and repaired my drones, made sure to resupply with cap boosters before heading out to do some things. A good night and a good start to the day.

Pissonp has lost three Ravens to me in two days, six altogether in four days to Nozaro, kerjn and myself. It's just not his week

Tagged

Seems the EVE Blogging community are playing a game of tag and it seems I'm it.

Thanks flash :p


1. I'm German born, grew up in South Africa, currently work and live in sunny England and have travelled all over the world.
2. I once walked into CCP's offices in Reykjavik to ask if I could change a skill. They said no :(
3. I'm a Chef, so spend more time at work than most people.
4. Have on more than one occasion considered joining the French Foreign Legion.
5. I have a savage Cherry Coke addiction.
6. I ice skate but wish I had the time to play hockey.
7. I can speak 4 languages and can swear in a further 14

The Rules:

1. Link to the original tagger(s), and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about myself in the post - some random, some weird.
   
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names and the links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment on their blogs and/or Twitter.

Alia Xii @ The Caldari Piratess
Furious @ Drawing Aggro
Felysta Sandorn @ Vagabond's Requiem
Cussbeard @ A Fistful of ISK
PsycheDiver @ Diving into PsycheDiver's Psyche
Sarah Conna @ Sarah Conna Chronicles
Jorge Belda

The seven I've chosen have not been tagged yet so I'm hoping they keep up :p

YOINK!

"You can think and you can fight, but the world's always movin', and if you wanna stay ahead you gotta dance."

-- (Terry Pratchett, The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents)

Sometimes you just have to smile. I was bombing around in my Pilgrim trying to see if I could catch anything, scored an Ishkur kill in Gus before moving on out to surrounding systems. Joined up with Arzal trying to jack a Megathron who was sniping on a gate in Ingunn but all of Arzal's hard work probing him out were for nought as I uncloaked to try and lock before he warped off. He was aligned and at speed and got away before my lock resolved.

I was still mucking about in Ingunn watching a Megathron and Abbadon play docking games when a Cyclone undocked and warped to a planet, I followed but found he was safe spotted. So I gave my friend a call, she had just replaced her Cheetah, which was killed by the Megathron we missed earlier (An unfortunate cloaking accident led to her demise) and she headed straight on over to probe him out. Seconds after she dropped her first probe she reported a hit, I waited as she set up the warpin.

"No mistakes this time."

I warped in at her signal and landed right on top of the Cyclone, sitting dead still, I locked, scrammed, webbed and set my tracking disruptor active. A swarm of Hammerhead drones engulfed him and went to work as I held a tight 500 metre orbit. He deployed a flight of medium ECM drones and it wasn't long before they got there first cycle.

"Oh for crying out loud."

I furiously spammed lock on him and his drones. First order of business was to destroy the drones, my lock resolved and my Hammerheads were sent to intercept his Vespas. One down as another jam cycle hits me.

"Now you're starting to annoy me" I said to the Cyclone pilot although he probably didn't hear it.

My drones were now autonomous and were still taking out his ECM annoyances. He got one last cycle on me just as the last drone popped but it was now a matter of seconds before I started in on him again. My armour repairer and cap booster were working overtime, earning there keep as I finally got lock again, set the tracking disruptor active and resumed my tight orbit with the aid of scrambler and web. Hammerheads tearing into his shields as he capped out and lost his shield hardeners. He was at about half armour when he did something that surprised me... HE EJECTED!

Kane Rizzel > good fight I suppose
Shilo Harris > eh, was afk for the first 2 min so yeah :)

His escape pod made a hasty exit stage left.

Drones recalled in an instant as I set a bookmark of the Cyclone's location, warped to a station, ejected my pod, undocked and went about some Grand Theft Cyclone.

I boarded the Cyclone and was pleasantly surprised at the haul, some nice tech 2 goodness which will fetch a shiny penny in Rens.




2008.12.15 18:59
okay i'm noticing from the lack of insurance that you probably quit shooting and stole my ship.

either you're a great pirate, or i'm a dumbass, or both :)

Well, a little of both mate. Was a good fight and even though I didn't get a killmail the ISK is always welcome

UPDATE

I was sitting cloaked in the Pilgrim when I spotted a Claw interceptor entering the local 2/10 plex, knowing I couldn't follow in the recon I docked up and grabbed Going Postal™ for a bit of Rifter violence.

I warped in to the plex, having made sure I had the keys for the next two acceleration gates. The Claw was moving quickly through the rooms, not spending time to engage the Gistii guards. I approached the third gate, scanner showing my mark in the third room. I burst out of warp, trails of plasma streaming of the Rifter hull. My intended victim was 50km away so I punched my afterburner and started to make to intercept his orbit.

The Claw pilot didn't notice me until it was too late as I relieved him of the confines of the once beautiful Claw. His escape pod was scrambled and ransom terms offered in private convo.

"I don't have any implants so pod away" was his reply to which I gladly obliged.

The loot surprised me but I also grabbed the loot from the deadspace overseers can, which yielded a Gistii B-Type 1mn Microwarp Drive, Afterburner and Small Shield Transporter.

A nice kill, an even better haul in loot.

Update part deux

I have a new forum signature and blog banner courtesy of Brother Benthor

Hide and Shoot

"'E's fighting in there!" he stuttered, grabbing the captain's arm. "All by himself?" said the captain. "No, with everyone!" shouted Nobby, hopping from one foot to the other.

-- Making Friends and Hitting People (Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!)

Rumours of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. I've just been busy is all.

I stumbled into the hangar and winced as I hit something that might have been ammunition. Everything is powered down and there is no light to speak of until I find the cursed light switch. Slowly dawn breaks upon the NovaKane hangar and makeshift office. Ships, mods and ammo litter every corner. I walk on over to my desk and get to working through the mass of mail and station bills. Interesting times again as Mean Corp and The Bastards have ended a long relationship and initiated hostilities to each other. I did help Mean down a carrier a week back and I do enjoy flying with The Bastards but I'll just do my own thing and stay out of it.

Keira has been busy in highsec helping a cousin get standings with one of the Empire corps so he can get jumpclones but other than that it's been quiet for the family.

I boarded my Rifter as my covops friend had said there were a few of its kin in system, the paperwork could wait. I undocked to see if anyone wanted a fight, I scanned out two of them and headed towards their location only to miss them as they warped to the station. I followed as is my way and waited to see if they would engage me, one did and paid the price. The other became the victim of the station's automated sentries by engaging another Rifter who wasn't an outlaw.

I docked up as I was itching to try a new ship, something I've been training for a while now and finally felt comfortable taking it out and getting some red on it. The Pilgrim force recon is a sexy little beast although it felt weird flying something which didn't actually have any guns fitted. Its main offensive capabilities being energy neutralisers and drones. I went on over to Eifer to see what was about and soon was vectoring in on a Jaguar and Retribution. I warped in on top of them both, uncloaked and started targeting but they warped out before I could get a lock.

"Too slow" I said to myself as I cloaked and warped to a scan spot.

"There's a Raven in Gus... Missioning"

"You have a probe out"

"But of course, by the time you get your ass here I'll have the warp in"

Awesome, a true test for Kumano-Sanzan. I jumped into Gusandall just as my friend stated she was on the acceleration gate. I immediately intiated warp, cloaking in the process. I arrived, the gate alone in the dark, my friend safely cloaked above it, I activated it and was slung into the deadspace. I burst out of warp to see the Raven fighting some Amarr cruisers and battleships and still under cloak I closed the distance. Once in range of my scrambler and web I uncloaked and engaged. The Raven locked me and cruise missiles were launched in my direction. A flight of Hammerhead drones spewed forth from my drone bay and started stripping the Raven's shields. He was tanking comfortable enough as the first assualt from his cruise launchers slammed into my Pilgrim.

"Probably a good idea to turn on the armour hardeners and damage control."

My drones were slowly eating his shields as he desperately tried to tank but this was made difficult by my energy neutralisers sucking the life out of his Raven. My cap booster was chewing through its charges as my armour repairer kept up with the cruise missile damage. His tank was broken, capped out and no way back now as the Hammerheads hammered the final nail into his coffin.

A satisfying kill and some nice loot. I'm going to have some fun with this ship

I might not be around much until January but fear not, the blood and tears will flow once I'm back.

Going Postal™

"I believe it's very hard to have fun in Iceland without fish being involved in some way."

-- Looking for a good place to party (Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead)

Painting the system red

Going Postal™ is once more out in Eifer, it's pilot eager to kill something. The usual array of haulers and travellers passing through but nothing of note. The Rifter's primeval scanning equipment shows a Griffin on scan and under the expert direction of the pilot warps into the belt. The scanner is still doing its rounds as it picks up a Vagabond, Going Postal ™ lands in the belt and engages the Griffin but is interupted by the Vagabond, the Rifter's warp engines fire up as the pilot takes the smart option and leaves well enough alone.

The Vagabond leaves but the Griffin is still about, quite obviosuly bait for the heavy assault cruiser.

Going Postal™'s pilot is no fool, well sometimes he's a little too cavalier for her liking which has resulted in many of her kin meeting with a sticky end but he's no fool. She's glad she has such an accomplished pilot, not many of her kind have been so fortunate. He has fitted her with the most high tech gear he could find and is always taking her out on epic adventures.

Local comms shows an aquaintance of her pilot had entered Eifer and he's in one of her kin. A few minutes later another aquaintance popped in flying a Vengeance, the pilots spoke in a shared intel channel as the Griffin appeared back on scan, the Vagabond was back in system and a plan was hatched, spring the trap and engage the Vagabond.

Going Postal™ was ready, this was her reason for being and her pilot was just crazy enough to pull this off.

Griffin was engaged in the belt by the other Rifter and the Vengeance, Going Postal™'s scanner waiting for the moment the Vagabond entered the belt, aligned to insta warp in and go to work.
The Griffin popped just as the Vagabond appeared on scan, Going Postal™ fired her warp drive and was instantly launched into the belt. She landed right on top of the Vagabond, pulsed her afterburner and settled into a nice easy 5km orbit. The other Rifter and Vengeance were already engaging the Vaga, his warp core and microwarp drive scrambled, his speed halted with stasis webs. Going Postal spun up her guns and rocket launcher. The Vagabond launched drones and the other Rifter was slightly too slow to react as he was chewed up by the autonomous drones. Going Postal™'s pilot knew well enough to start targeting the drones, the Vengeance followed suit and soon they were all killed, back to the Vagabond who was now a sitting duck, his guns too big and slow to cause much harm to Going Postal™ as she rained down sweet death upon it.

After an epic few minutes the tank of the Vagabond was broken, Going Postal™'s pilot gave an almighty roar as bits of Vaga rained down on her, Going Postal™ loves the rain.

Mad props to Jorge and Hallan from The Bastards for the epic kill

The Bastards

The Bastards are a great crew based a few jumps away from me and I've been honoured a few times to be invited to fly with them. Tonight as I was sitting in Gus station basking in the afterglow of the Vagabond kill I got a call from them asking if I wanted to take The Fifth Elephant™ out for a spin. They had scanned down a Maelstrom, Myrmidon and Hulk in a system right next door to Gus. Unfortunately they found the quarry to be in a mission/hidden belt so I asked my friend in her covops to go have a looksee. Soon after entering system she had dropped a snoop probe and after three scans got a hit on the Hulk, she warped in at range as not to get decloaked and started to try and get us a good warp in. Unfortunately there were loads of wrecks and drones all over the place so she got as close as she could without getting decloaked before giving us the go ahead to warp in. The assembled gang jumped in and soon we all landed not far from the Myrmidon and Maelstrom. The Hulk was too far away but the other two were already tackled, Myrmidon was primary as the smaller ships tried desperately to get in range of the Hulk but were too slow as the mining barge warped out. No matter, the Myrmidon and Maelstrom would have to do and they did nicely, both being destroyed with out breaking a sweat.

As the gang was going it's own way, a Drake and Myrmidon were reported one jump out, on the gate and engaging, we all rushed on over and introduced the pilots to some good old fashioned lowsec violence. They went down so quickly I barely had time to take note of their names.

I headed back to Gusandall, content with a good nights hunting. Thanks you Bastards, was awesome fun

When the mad man is grinning... It's time to go

"Nac mac Feegle wha hae!"

-- (Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum)

"Suprise"

"A Republic Fleet Firetail you say?"
...

"In my plex?"
...

"Of course I'm going to bloody kill it"

News of a faction frigate reaches my ears, the very fact it is from a faction makes it a very tempting target and one which I can not and shall not refuse. Normally in this kind of situation where there are trespassers in the local 2/10 I would grab Maurice™ my Jaguar plex hunter but I felt like playing with my quarry and took Going Postal™ for a spin in the black.

I undock and warp to the gate, hitting the scan button to make sure he's still there, I land on the gate and activate it, get launched deep into the plex and wait the agonizing seconds until I land.

He's not in the first pocket, damn. It's at this point I realise I made a mistake, I had no keys for the deeper plex gates. So... I warp to the station, dock, grab some keys and undock.

Wash, rinse, repeat.

Except this time I head towards the second gate and activate it, it launches my Rifter into the second pocket, I don't expect to see the Firetail there as he'll be moving on to the third pocket, I make a beeline for the gate, activate it, all the while mashing that scan button in the direction of the third pocket. He's in there alright and about to have a nice suprise.

I burst out of warp with the Firetail about 40km away, I curse my luck but no matter, afterburner glows as I start to close. The distance closes very quickly as I notice the Firetail is coming for me. Most excellent, not what I would do if I saw myself coming towards myself but I imagine his thought process went a bit like this:

"Oh look, a Rifter. How'd he get in here? He's all flashing red, oh look, a bounty, that's nice, I could do with some ISK, I'll just kill him and carry on in here"

Now, his first mistake was not warping out as I came in, his second mistake was engaging me. This is what I wanted and I think if he saw my mad grinning face in my pod he would have not made either the first or the second.

Once in range of my tackling gear I locked him up and activated the scram and web. Now that he wasn't going anywhere I punched the guns and rocket launcher and they started to have their way with the Firetail. The rather beautiful ship, in my eyes, no match for the sheer awesomeness of my Rifter. The Firetail exploded, raining bits of debris against my hull, it brought joyjoy feelings to my black heart but I was not done. The pod was locked and scrambled and as I was in a good mood I opened comms with the stricken Pilot.

"5mil and you can go on your merry"

"OK" he replied and a quick glance at my online banking showed he deposited the required amount in to my account.

"Have a nice day" I said as I disengaged.

I docked up and got ready to go out, I was going Ice Skating

You wouldn't believe the things I have to do to get a fight?

Had a great time at the ice rink last night and had spent most of the day doing things that needed doing but I was ready to take Going Postal™ out for a spin. I headed to Eifer and warped to my usual spot and proceeded to scan. There was a Rifter about so I started the hunt, I narrowed him down to the V cluster, warped to the planet and started scanning the belts. He was at a safespot as none of my small arcs found a hit at a belt or moon, so I warped to a belt to see if he would try and hunt me.

Negative on the being hunted scenario but have no fear, a Thrasher has warped into the first belt.

This was going to work out nicely I thought to myself, grinning at the prospect of a combo meal. I warped into the first belt and as expected was greeted by the Thrasher, he was 30 clicks away but no bother, I would just mosey on over and introduce myself. I engaged the Thrasher with all the violence my Rifter could muster and soon he was in danger of exploding, it was at this point my cunning plan bore fruit as the Rifter warped in and engaged me.

Awesome, I finished off the Thrasher as I locked the Rifter, who was closing fast, my tackling gear switching to him as soon as the Thrasher exploded.

"Let's dance my friend" I said to no-one in particular as the Thrasher pilot warped his escape pod out of the belt. Rifter vs Rifter, the truest test of a pilots skills and abilities. Unfortunately for the pilot of the other Rifter, mine have been honed in combat for years. The very thought of combat, win or lose is what I live for, the hunt being the blood that drives my heart.

The Rifter hit armour, my shields long ago having been stripped by the Thasher.

"Good armour" I thought to myself as round after round, rocket after rocket smashed into it. This guy was either really skilled or had an oversized armour plate. No matter, more armour just meant more fight and boy was I having fun.

But like all things in life, good times must end and for my opponent it must have been demoralising as his ship exploded in a beautiful firework display, his escape pod being locked and scrambled before he had a chance to react, waking up in a cloning vat is not pleasant but best he gets used to it now.

I scooped all the loot and my trophy corpse and warp to a safespot to wait out my Criminal timer, a mad grin across my face as a cunning plan works out beautifully.

I head back to Gusandall pleased with my nights work, short, but oh so very sweet.

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES COME ON!

The world is made up of four elements: Earth, Air, Fire and Water. This is a fact well known even to Corporal Nobbs. It's also wrong. There's a fifth element, and generally it's called Surprise.

-- (Terry Pratchett, The Truth)

This is my Broadsword, let me show you it

Lights flicker to life as I enter the hangar, seems Keira has neglected to move loot again but no matter, today is not the day to worry about such minor issues, today is a day to celebrate.

I look over my array of ships and pick a Rifter, time to pay a visit to Eifer. My head is a bit tender as I just had some new implants installed into this clone and they kind of dulled the senses but that too will pass, I was eager to get out into the black and do some old fashioned Piracy.

Eifer was dead but news had come through of a Megathron in an adjacent system doing a mission. I hurried back to Gus to grab Guards! Guards! my Broadsword. It is a well known fact that many lowsec mission runners fit warp core stabilisers and nothing ruins their day like a Broadsword to the head.

My friend in her covops was dispatched to probe him out as the gang was forming. She got a hit with her first sweep and had soon vectored us in to the mission gates. Yes, that's not a mistake, there were three gates going in different directions but she used her on-board scanner to determine he was in the direction of the Alpha gate. I jumped in and warped to the gates, landing 17km from the Alpha gate I activated my afterburner and closed as the rest of the small fleet assembled flashed out of warp.

I activate the gate and... Nothing, an automated message appears on my HUD saying it is locked and requires a special key to activate. Damn, what now, well the other two gates were clear of wrecks and we assumed he'd have to return here to use them so we had the covops and a recon stay put as we left system or warped to deep safespots.

News of a Fleet Issue Tempest in Gusandall got the pulses racing as the small gang, hungry for a kill closed in, he was trapped and was soon collared at a gate but made the mistake of aggressing before jumping, making it now impossible to get away as we tore him apart. It wasn't a very memorable fight but a kill is a kill, we didn't even have a chance to ransom as his armour and hull vaporized under our assault.

Meanwhile, in a system right next door the Megathron had returned so I made all haste to get back in there. It seemed he had docked for a while but our scouts reported him back on scanner, I got into position in system and waited for him to warp in. Our scouts gave the call as he warped in and I initiated warp of my own to their position. Warp trails streamed off my Broadsword as my systems showed I landed right on top of him. Tackling systems primed in warp went active as my lock resolves.

Kane Rizzel > hello there precious
Zenithil > Hi
Zenithil > You guys willing to trade?

Mmm, he wanted a ransom so it was offered and we each made a nice little bit of ISK for our trouble. We left him to his business and went on our merry. I returned to Gus and checked in at the station but was soon back out in the black as a Maelstrom was tackled on the Gus gate in Eifer, I raced there and we vaporized him as he didn't answer the ransom request.

Apparently I can't solo two Ruptures

Back in a Rifter and back in Eifer I had scanned out two Ruptures, not in the same spot but definitely together as they were in the same corp. I warped in to where one was and engaged, I had taken his shields out as his friend came in and my Rifter didn't last long, I warped my escape pod out towards Gus as I was going to fetch Flubber™, my Fleet Stabber. I came back and they were bouncing safes so I offered a 1v2 which was never answered. I really wanted revenge for what they did to my wonderful Rifter.

Falcon, meet Flubber™

News comes in of a battlecruiser being engaged in Gusandall and I make haste there, I jump in just as it all kicks off and a rather sizeable gang engages the local Pirates. They had a Falcon and I made a beeline towards it, it was my only target and the thing I wanted to kill most. As I burned towards it, his friends opened up on me, along with the sentries as I had a GCC from my fight against the Ruptures.

Just as I was about to get into warp disruption range he warped out and the rest of the locals disengaged as the hostiles outnumbered and outgunned us. I warped out and docked, setting my hangar crew to knocking out the dents in Flubber™

Roaming Bastards

I get a call from my old friend flashfresh who asks if I want to go on a T1 frigate roam with him and The Bastards. Hells yeah I do, just let me get a new Rifter set up and wait out my GCC and I would be right over. Fellow blogger Mynxee was in gang too along with some other Hellcats members, an honour to fly with the female Pirates of the verse. All in all about 17 assorted frigates to cause havoc amongst the stars.

I headed out to where they were waiting and after a few minutes we set out, not much in the first few jumps but eventually we found a Harbinger Ratting. The swarm of frigates descended on him and proceeded to violence his boat, to such an extent it exploded. His corpse was liberated from the confines of his escape pod in the blink of an eye.

We ran across a Hurricane in the same system and he too met with a sticky end.

Bouncing around we eventually tried to engage a flashy red Abaddon on a station but he docked, more from fright as his overview filled up than any damage he was taking on his massive armour.

Then came the icefield in Oddelulf. A Jaguar and three destroyers engaged us and were all destroyed although we also took some losses.

The roam ran out of steam at this point and I decided to return home and see what was about.

Vexor meet Flubber™

I get a call from my friend in her covops who says she just busted a safespot of a Vexor cruiser. Flubber™ gets another spin in the black as I undock and warp to her position.

I burst out of warp a few clicks off him and close the distance, my lock has already resolved and the warp disruptor is glowing a satisfactory green as it pulses and makes sure he doesn't get away. He's up for a fight as he returns lock and closes, web, scram and drones are set upon Flubber™ as my guns blast massive holes in his armour. He has energy neutralisers and vampires painting a pretty picture across Gusandall's dark hues but it doesn't last long as his armour fails and shortly after so does the structure. Good fight is shared in local comms as he warps his escape pod away from the carnage.

So what's with the celebration?

I sit back in my deck chair in my hangar and reflect on a rather good day, made the more merry by the fact this is my century of blog posts. It's taken a while as I'm not as prolific as some of the other bloggers out there and sometimes my stories might not capture the imagination but I try my best. Over eleven and a half thousand visitors have viewed these stories and whilst it might not compare to some of the more popular blogs, it sure sems a lot to me, not sure why people would want to read about my adventures but it seems to have a following.

As I was writing this I was notified of trespassers in our local 2/10 plex, a Wolf assault frigate and a Coercer destroyer. Maurice™ my Jaguar was just waiting for such an opportunity and I quickly boarded and undocked. Making all haste to the plex gate I burst out of warp hammering the scan button in the direction of it's trajectory, they were still there. Activating the ancient gate I was launched into familiar territory, trails of warp streamed off the Jaguar's beautiful hull as she lands right on top of the Coercer, guess it was primary as the Wolf was 30clicks away. The Coercer was going down hard as the Wolf closed, I did the same and as the destroyer was destroyed I switched tackle over and proceeded to introduce the pilot to the colour of his liver. Another trophy for "The Morgue"

I scoop the loot and dock up. Need to take some painkillers as these implants are hurting a bit.
I light a celebratory cigarette and make myself a cup of tea.

It's good to be the King :P

Check out flashfresh's blog for his Pirate blog speedlinking, a one stop resource for all things YARR!

RIFTER GOGOGOGOGOGO

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.

Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

Aah, Eifer... No other system in the verse has brought me as much joy and loads of frustration as her. I was sitting in my usual spot watching the traffic go by on the local comms net when I spotted an Intel channel flashing


Aiko Shinjiro > hrond 6-1
Aiko Shinjiro > gogogo
Aiko Shinjiro > navy mega
mandaro > hrond 6-1 go gog og
Kane Rizzel > omw

I burst out of warp on the Gusandall gate, activating the massive structure as soon as the last trails of warp evaporated off my Rifter

Aiko Shinjiro > with fighter support fyi
Kane Rizzel > I'm in a rifter, he stands no chance

I broke gate cloak in Gusandall and whipped Going Postal™ towards the Hrond gate, straining metal filling my ears as she fought the turn.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Good to hear your voice again sweetheart. The short warp to the Hrond gate feels like forever as the anticipation builds, I just hope I have something to shoot at by the time I arrive. Once again I activate the gate as soon as I land and hit warp to the belt.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Kane Rizzel > inbound
Kane Rizzel > AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY

Moments later

Kane Rizzel > told you
Kane Rizzel > corpse is mine YARRR

The Navy Megathron was dispatched even with the presence of two carrier's fighters and the quick lock of my Rifter made sure his corpse would become a meat popsicle.

I returned to Eifer to see if any other unfortunate souls would be about and set about making a Cormorant pilot very uncomfortable, so much so he left the system in a flash of his own pod.
Sometimes I'm a bit too ruthless but I suppose that's like saying a star is a bit too hot.

I head home and dock up, it's been an interesting evening, introspection and destruction. I light a cigarette, take a deep breathe, put some tunes on the HiFi and lean back in my chair.

All I need now is a good nights sleep.

Kane shuffles his feet

A learning experience is one of those things that say, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'

- Douglas Adams

The voices in my head no longer talk to me, they just talk amongst themselves but I can still hear them.

It's not always easy flying alone in the dark. There's danger around every planet, death lurking in every asteroid belt and that's just me. Now imagine everyone else.

Every now and again I question if what I'm doing is the right course for me, whether being a solo Pirate is right for me. It's times like this I have to weigh the Pros and Cons of my particular brand of violence. Now I will state first and foremost I will remain a solo Pirate, it's just that the voices in my head sometimes argue that I could achieve so much more. Unfortunately I doubt that will happen and I'll just keep harassing the locals and interlopers to my little corner of the universe.

I've seen what my friend flashfresh has been achieving with the Bastards and it leaves me in awe, he recounts the most recent awesomeness here, bringing you right into the fight. That's some hot action right there as a fleet of frigates decimates battleships and support. That's the kind of action I'm looking for.

Anything can be achieved with numbers and the right mindset. Not every corp is like the Bastards though and flash did well joining their ranks, in fact I think it's the Bastards who did well by recruiting him more than anything else.

Me? Well, I prefer the freedom of being solo, not having to commit to anything I don't want to, able to determine my path amongst the stars as an independent pilot. Like I said it gets lonely but I have Independence chat channel where I can shoot the breeze with like minded individuals. The channel was created by flash when he still operated solo, what a long time ago that seems but it has become a sort of home for me and others who have at one time or another lived in the Gusandall pocket.

Time is the worst place, so to speak, to get lost in...

The loot hangar has been cleared and the ISK from my endeavours has helped the wallet along. Keira has been busy moving things to market hubs. There's a spring in her step, the massive Archon carrier that now dominates our hangar a huge achievement for her and I'm proud of her determination to train and earn it. She made all the ISK for it herself, none of it was taken from my wallet or that of NovaKane Inc. When she first approached me with the notion of getting a capital ship I said "YOU WANT WHAT?" But to her credit she knuckled down and earned the ISK, studied rellentlessly and now I can't stop her grinning.

For me personally there's nothing new on the horizon, I've spent my time studying to perfect certain skills. Many changes have occured whilst I've been on my sabbatical and it'll take me a bit of time to adapt even with the amount of testing I'd done on the Singularity and Multiplicity simulation servers. Not so much to the speed changes, while I held a few speed records, I never used speed as my main tactical advantage but the suicidal ability to get eye to eye with my opponents and slug it out.

The times they are a changing and we need to change with them.

The EVE universe is a harsh mistress and I look forward to introducing people to just how harsh she can be.

I leave you with some local chat flavour

Halkdaff > Hey, Kane Rizzel, soon I shall come for you!
pvp god > mwhahahaha
Aiko Shinjiro > uhoh we are in panic
Kane Rizzel > planet 1, 5 minutes... OK?
Halkdaff > Not so it is fast, but time will come.
Kane Rizzel > ok, well I'll be here, come back soon
Kane Rizzel > bring cookies

Upon entering C9N w/3 Vigils and a shuttle during the BoB/ASCN war 2006:
Mobile Oak > you're going down!
Jonathan Xavier > 100M or pod
MrDetermination > drones are cheating, man
Theris Elistriter > wait...aren't we using drones?
Mobile Oak > economically I think we still win
Hey You > rofl
Hey You > how so?
Mobile Oak > you wasted tech 2 torps to shoot us
Tovar Milendis > In the game of life we are all winners.
Jonathan Xavier > each precision cruise cost more than my
shuttle :)
Mobile Oak > bye now!
Mobile Oak > fly safe!
Theris Elistriter > o/
Hey You > lol
Hey You > laters
Tovar Milendis > Keep this up and we'll bleed BoB dry!

Guess who's back?

He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which.

- Douglas Adams

Something wicked this way comes

It's a curious thing... Space. The allure of the darkness and the ability it has to consume your every waking moment. It's really dark in space, well, except for all the light. Oh boy the light, the agent dispatched to help with tonight's operation shields his eyes as his systems go off-line, the sheer amount of energy to do what he just did totally incapacitating his ship.

The Cynosaural Field is used to move ships too big to jump through regular stargates. Months of preparation and training had led to this moment as Keira jumped the massive Archon carrier into Gusandall for the first time. The NovaKane fleet has a new flagship.

I always said I will never fly anything bigger than a Command ship but Keira had spent so much time training to be an epic command pilot she decided to move it up a gear and spec towards Capital ships, mainly because she could and partly just to annoy me, at least that's the way I see it.

Interesting times ahead :D

Back with a bang

mandaro > EIFER GATE GUS NOW NEED DPS

Not the most eloquent of requests but short and to the point. What did they have tackled, what juicy treat would welcome me back into my world? The one place I'm truly at home. Which poor soul was having a bad day? Guess his day was about to become decidedly worse.

The Fifth Elephant™ slides effortlessly out of the dock and enters space... It's been a long time but it's like breathing, it's just natural. I engage warp towards the gate and head on in, only intel I've gleaned is that the unfortunate pilot was flying a Charon Freighter and he refused to answer the ransom offer. I entered the fray in the only way I know how, guns a blazing and soon the Charon would join the endless debris in space. Empty and no ransom but a welcome kill for me personally, a nice easy and relaxing way to ease myself back into the darkness.

It's good to be back

[OOC] An Update of sorts

- "You're Hells Angels, then? What chapter are you from?"
- REVELATIONS, CHAPTER SIX.

-- Death in conversation with a biker (Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens)

I'm out of game for the foreseeable future due to pressure at work and upcoming leave. I may from time to time log in just to check mail and the like but apologies to anyone who may feel I'm being rude by not saying hi.

There are many other blogs out there that are worth reading and you can find some of them linked in my sidebar.

Catch you when I get back :P

So Kane, anything exciting happen?

• Canis meus id comedit.
  My dog ate it.

A slow few days. Lost two Rifters, one trying to solo an Arbitrator and another trying to solo a Hurricane. Two Assault Frigates, three Frigates, two Cruisers, two Destroyers, two Battlecruisers, a single Covert Ops frigate and six pods killed. I don't count the few hundred haulers killed in two seperate gatecamps as they are just fluf and don't really count towards anything meanigful, I was bored and there weren't any targets around (None of the hauler kills were posted to my killboard)

No fight really stands out and I'm struggling to come up with something witty or clever to write, just thought I'd write a small update. Sorry to disappoint.

I highly recommend reading this blog post by San Rintu about a truly amazing kill for flash and his new corp mates, The Bastards. A kill all Pirates dream of, Faction ship with some juicy modules and most of the good stuff dropped. Flash's own account of their good fortune can be found here.

Right now it's time for dinner and maybe some movies, also need to get Keira to move some of this loot that's cluttering up the hangar.

I get knocked down, but I get up again.

In retrospect, Victor was always a little unclear about those next few minutes. That's the way it goes. The moments that change your life are the ones that happen suddenly, like the one where you die.

--Moving Pictures

"Sir"
"Yes, what is it now?"
"Well, there's a Rifter sir"
"A Rifter you say?"
"Yes sir"
"...and what about this Rifter?"
"Well it seems to be attacking us"
"ATTACKING US?"
"That is correct sir"
"Are we by any chance attacking back?
"Not at this time sir"
"WELL WHY THE HELL NOT?"
"It's a Rifter sir, it's not like it can hurt us, we are in a Raven battleship sir"
"Any details on the Rifter pilot?"
"He appears to be quite mad sir"
"He appears to be mad... Mad?"
"Yes sir"
"and how pray tell have you come to this astonishing conclusion?"
"He's in a Rifter sir"
"I think we've established that"
"and he's attacking a Raven battleship"
"Thank you captain obvious, I can see my money is well spent"
"Orders sir?"
"Oh I dunno, launch some missiles at him, that should scare him off"
"Aye sir"

...

"Sir"
"Yes?"
"Uhm... he's still attacking us"
"Have you tried warping to a stargate?"
"Aye sir, it appears our warp core is scrambled"
"Does he have any corp mates in system?"
"He appears to be alone sir, still firing on us though"

Meanwhile, aboard the Rifter:

"Is this thing on"
"What's up Kane"
"There's a Raven in Eifer"
"A Raven?"
"Is there an echo in here? Yes... A RAVEN"
"What about it?"
"I have it tackled"
"TACKLED?"
"yes, was wondering if anyone wanted a piece of the action"
"What are you flying?"
"A Rifter"
"A RIFTER?"
"Sheesh, this echo is annoying, I could use a hand to be honest, this guy can tank me all day"
"On our way"

Back on the Raven:

"Sir"
"What is it now?"
"It seems the local comms net has just spiked"
"And?"
"For a Captain of a battleship you sure do ask a lot of dumb questions"
"What?"
"See what I mean?"
"What did you just say?"
"Oops"
"What oops?"
"Onyx, Onyx, Onyx, Tempest and oh dear"
"What the hell is an oh dear?"
"It appears he has some friends... and they brought a Falcon"
"A Falcon?"
"Aye sir, it appears as if we are in a spot of bother"
"A spot of bother you say?"
"That I did"
"Wonderful, a few months out of the academy and I'm in a spot of bother"
"Systems jammed, shields failing"
"Great, just great"

...

"Where am I?"
"Welcome to the Quafe Company cloning facilities"
"Cloning facilities, how the fuck I get here?
"Now now, no need for that kind of language"
"Language? what's wrong with my fucking language? How the fuck did I get here?"
"It appears your escape pod was destroyed, hence you waking up in a cloning vat"
"UGH, headache"
"An unfortunate side effect but one that will pass, here's your bill, have a nice day"

Clawing my way back

Mmm, a Drake on scan, I narrow it down to a cluster and warp to the first belt at range.
Mmm, a Claw too, this should be interesting.
I engaged my warp drive to where the Claw appeared to be. Warp trails streaming off my Rifter as I entered normal space, the Claw over 140 clicks above me. I guess I'll just play possum and see if he bites.

Of course he bit, closing the distance quickly, very quicly. In the blink of an eye he was on top of me, the Drake warped in. Time to make a gracious exit.

"1v1 vs the Claw" I asked in local Comms
"Sure dude" came the reply

The Drake left the scene and I warped back in at a range of 100km. The Claw clearly confident closed quickly again, locked and engaged me. Kane being Kane returns the favour, web overloaded, waiting for that magic number to appear on the overview.

Claw is fast, over 6km/s, I'm patient though, at that speed he won't be doing much damage to me. He passes within web range but gains distance too quick for me to react. I make a straight trajectory at full speed, his orbit changes to compensate, I "Crazy Ivan"*, web goes active, distance is closed, at point blank range things go south for the Claw pilot. The cordial "GF" is shared in local as I allow the escape pod to warp out, something I tend to do with arranged 1v1s.

Props to both pilots for honouring the 1v1, I imagine it was difficult for the Drake pilot to sit in system as his friend was destroyed but they both earned my respect for that.

A good end to what had been a pretty bad day for me, as with all things it's how one reacts to loss that determines who he is. I returned to Gusandall, satisfied and in despearate need of a smoke and a cup of tea.

* Crazy Ivan as described in this tale.

Afternoons and Coffespoons

He'd never realized that, deep down inside, what he really wanted to do was make things go splat.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man)

Down to earth

I'm not as invincible as I like to believe, in fact, recently I've had pause to think about a lot of things but losing a ship brings perspective to life and my place in the universe. This afternoon I lost two.

I lost a Jaguar to another in my favourite hunting ground (A good fight and and props to Alex Medvedov), I then lost a Rifter whilst not paying attention.

As much as we build things up, as much as we train to better ourselves, as much as we spend to get that edge, it can all come crumbling down.

It's good to be humbled, it allows one the ability to pick yourself back up and work harder to be better.

Bloggers

There are other Pirates out their who share adventures and you would do well to peruse their blogs.

flashfresh: a friend and mentor. It was his writings that inspired me to start rambling on about my adventures. I've known him for as long as I've been a Pirate and my respect for him as a Pirate and a pilot are unsurpassed by any other.

Mynxee: A female Pirate... yes, you read that right, a FEMALE. She has embarked on a massive undertaking of starting an all female Pirate corp. Bringing death and destruction as only women can to a star system near you.

Spectre3353: A self confessed EVE noob but with a sense of humour and mean streak any Pirate would be proud of.

New Ink

A picture of my latest ink.


Work continues on my left arm and I'll post more pictures of that once it has been completed.

Ooh it's like a Pinata.

For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from, and (d) rocks.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Equal Rites)

OK, I'm on fire... Fire isn't good.

How did this happen? How did I let myself get into this position? Well, it's because I get big headed sometimes, I get greedy. I just can't leave well enough alone, I always have to take another shot at the title.

So it was that I chased the Jaguar into the 2/10 plex again, I had already killed him once today and I wanted the double.

The first fight was a good battle, both webbing each other, trying to maintain range, trying to keep transversal up. His tank similar to mine broke after a good 4 minute fight. This time however, I warped in right on top of him. I was locked, scrammed and webbed as I landed, I returned the favour but this time things went pretty bad for me, a close fight but he came out on top. I warped my pod out and docked up, no time to lick my wounds, I wanted to get out there and have another shot.

I grabbed another Jaguar , the corp requisition form will have to be filled in later, it was revenge time. 1-1, scores tied, there needed to be a winner. I undocked and warped to the plex, the red mist had descended, I wanted blood. Unfortunately the other Jaguar pilot decided that a draw was sufficient and docked up.

There was something else of interest, a Crow interceptor, in the top belt. Well time to play.

I warped in at zero, knowing full well the Crow would probably have moved off a bit and he had, over 120km, no bother, I hit my afterburner and started to move towards him at a liesurely pace. The Crow slowly started to bridge the gap and soon he settled into a lazy orbit around me, between 25km and 35km, peppering my shields with light missiles.

"Keira! You awake? Could use some of your magic."

It was clear the Crow didn't want to come within 20km of me, I don't blame him, so another tactic was required. I made as if I was aligning out, this choice would appear wise as my shields started to fail. I warped out to the planet and immediately set warp back to the belt. This short reprieve gave my shields a chance to regenerate. Once again we were separated by over 100clicks, once again I went through the motions to close the distance. The Crow now full of confidence did the same and soon we were dancing above the asteroids.

Deep in space a Claymore command ship uncloaked, it's gang mods activated.

"OK, you're good to go, don't lose another Jag, this could get embarrassing you know"

Well thank you Keira, so kind of you to join us.

Extra speed, extra range on the web, which was now set to overload. I made the motion to warp out again, lulling the Crow in. His orbit ellipsed and I did a Crazy Ivan.
Metal strained as the Jaguar fought the massive forces of the turn, my web set to overload and Keira's bonuses meant I was getting closer to the magic number. I kept a close watch on my overview and as he came into range it kicked in. I approached at full speed, ramming my Jaguar right into him. Webbed and scrammed, the Crow was vapourised in a flash.

Good fights were shared in local comms. Indeed it was.

Been a good day so far, even with the loss. A solo kill of a Rupture with my Rifter, a Wolf downed in a plex with my unfortunate Jaguar. Another Rupture using a Broadsword, then got a 1v1 offer from the downed pilot who brought a Burst to a Rifter fight (I let him get me to half shields before destroying him), then a suicide tackle on a Drake an Myrm with my Rifter, called in some friends for help, got the Myrmidon but Drake warped out (Need to share those points lads) and a good old fashioned Rifter vs Rifter fight.

I would later partake in a bit of a melee outside the station against pilots from Rage and Terror which ended 3 to 1 in their favour but interesting to be involved in.

Some good fights, an avoidable loss and fun all round, I retire to the comfort of my bunk.

It all adds up

All assassins had a full-length mirror in their rooms, because it would be a terrible insult to anyone to kill them when you were badly dressed.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Pyramids)

Contact

A Stabber class cruiser appears on my scanner, set to a 360 degree sweep it will pick up anything entering the asteroid clusters, I scan again to make sure the contact is in place and not just passing through. I narrow the arc to 90 degrees and scan the clusters, from my central position it's easy enough, second scan shows him at the V cluster and I initiate warp to the planet. I come out of warp and narrow the arc to 15 degrees. Belt one... Nothing. Belt two... Nothing. Belt three... Contact, confirmed Stabber class cruiser, ratting.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Warp Disruptor is set to overload, it is primed, the prey is still in the belt as I spam the scanner. I burst out of warp and the prey is there, lock resolves and his day goes from bad to worse. He locks back and launches a drone, I won't need mine. Stabber loses shields, then armour and finally his structure gives way to the sustained assault, Republic Fleet EMP rounds overwhelm him. Bits of Stabber rain against Flubber™ even as the lock resolves on the pod, the unfortunate pilot sent home via Clone Vat Express.

It's all about the hunt

Sometimes it's not the fight that makes a hunt, but the hunt itself. Finding the target is the number one skill any Pirate should have, without it, well, you'll starve. It doesn't matter how good your skills are, how awesome your ship is, if you can't find prey it's all for naught. The Stabber pilot started having a bad day the moment he appeared on my scanner. He wasn't very experienced, a young pilot from the quick background check I was able to run but the loot will melt down nicely.

I scoop everything, it's how I make my living. Sure it's nice to get that faction drop worth millions but the small amounts gathered here and there make up millions, millions which fund me nicely.

Yesterdays loss still reverberates in the back of my mind, I needed to clear the cobwebs, focus on what I was good at and that is making the lives of others a little more exciting, if a lot shorter.
With this in mind I took Flubber™ out for a spin even though I have a massive headache, the Stabber made a nice entrée.

I sat at my safespot, reading the local comms chatter when a Jaguar appeared on scan. Time to introduce it to the excitement that is lowsec Piracy. I warped in and landed right on top of him, no bother, I didn't fear the Jaguar, I locked, tackled, shot and destroyed the helpless pilot, his corpse now residing in "The Morgue" A Deimos had warped in too and helped finish him off. A Rupture was about but it bugged out rather rapidly at the sight of a Fleet Stabber and Deimos.
The Deimos was a friend, hunting independently but a welcome sight. Unfortunately the Rupture wouldn't show himself again as he had cloaked somewhere in system, eventually leaving as more local Pirates came to Eifer.

I caught a Rifter ratting while I was waiting out my GCC, my hold now full of loot, time to go home.

Three kills, not very exciting but then not every hunt is. This was bread and butter Piracy, that which we need to keep the blood pumping and the ISK flowing. There's loot everywhere in the hangar, been a decent week even with the loss of my Broadsword.

I sit back and relax, music in the background as I light a cigarette and draw deeply. Piracy has it's ups and downs but I wouldn't want to do anything else, it's what I have become, what I am and it's so damn good.

Lost

People who didn't need people needed people around to know that they were the kind of people who didn't need people.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Maskerade)

It's not always easy losing ships, especially ones that have served me so well.

News had trickled down of a small gang consisting of a Curse, Ishtar, Vexor, Harbinger, Brutix and Falcon hanging about in Emolgranlan on the Eifer gate, I volunteered to bait so boarded my faithful Broadsword and said I would be the worm. I had set up in a belt but Intel reached us that they had moved off the gate so it seemed that the opportunity for a fight had passed but another mark had presented itself in the shape of a Dominix that never jumped into Eifer. Of course at this point I was on the gate when the Falcon jumped through and cloaked, followed shortly after by the Curse.

Curse immediately lit me up and closed the distance to tackle, Falcon de cloaked and jammed and the rest of them jumped in and proceeded to violence my boat.

xxxx > Don't fight on the gate

Well a bit too fucking late for that now, I was going down, no cap, jammed, webbed, tackled and no sight of any of my gang mates. Monstrous Regiment exploded, a ship that has served me so well just annihilated in the most obscene fashion.

This is what I get for flying with others.

I warped my escape pod out and headed straight back to Gusandall to lick my wounds.

I lit a cigarette and made myself a cup of hot chocolate, I needed something sweet.

I can ride my bike with no handlebars

In the Beginning there was nothing, which exploded.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies)

"Huginn in Eifer"

Those three magic words enough to get the blood pumping.

Been a lazy day thus far, actually managed some sleep, well more like an exhaustion induced coma but I woke up groggy and boarded Flubber™ for some hunting, I caught a Rupture earlier with the help of El Nabe, or to be more precise, I warped in on El Nabe killing a Rupture and added my unique brand of violence to the mix.

But the news of a Huginn in Eifer was enough to draw me out once again and soon I was jumping the gate into my kingdom. Once in system I checked the Intel channels again and gathered the Huginn was in the V belts, so I warped to the planet and scanned him to the third belt in the cluster.

WARP DRIVE ACTIVE

Those iconic words immortalised by Winterblink in his amazing work and words that sooth and invigorate at the same time. I kept hitting the scanner hoping the Huginn was still in place, willing him to be there.

A Huginn is a very good ship, one I have flown on a few occasions, able to dictate range with it's webbing bonuses and able to deal a good amount of pain to anything smaller than a Battlecruiser.
Flubber™ would be tested to the limit in this encounter and I was really eager to engage.

My Fleet Stabber burst out of warp about 40km away from the Huginn, I gathered my senses and started to close as soon as the last trails of warp evaporated off my ship. Tackling gear was primed but not overloaded, I had a good run in, good speed and was closing fast. I locked and engaged my warp disruptor, beams of energy reaching out and disrupting the flow of the Huginn's warp drive. At this point he locked back but I was closing fast and in the blink of an eye I was on top of him and he was now webbed, his ability to dictate range now gone the fight was well and truly on.

A flight of small combat drones streaked out from him and swarmed me, I deployed my own drones and a feature of the Fleet Stabber made me smile... It has a huge drone bay for a Minmatar cruiser. My three medium and two small ECM drones reached out and... HOLY SHIT, THEY WORKED. A good jam cycle and my guns were eating into his shields, slowly but surely. He regained lock and continued to rain heavy assault missiles and autocannon rounds into Flubber™. My shields had failed and my armour started turning red, one eye on the overview as the bar turned red and continued to do so. I overloaded my guns, squeezing every ounce of DPS out of them, his shields failed and his armour started to vapourise. It didn't last long and as the last remnants of armour disappeared a Drake warped in, the pilot who had originally reported the mark. His structure vanished near instantly and bits of Huginn rained against Flubber™. Her targetting systems quick enough to resolve a lock on the pod and yet another corpse was added to "the Morgue"

I glanced down at my HUD and noticed I was at 20% armour, a close fight indeed and one I was stoked about, blood full of adrenaline. What a rush.

Back in Gusandall it was time for dinner, maybe a smoke and a cup of tea.

So my ISK farming friend, we meet again.

"Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!"

-- Rule One (Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time)

Nothing in the universe gives me greater pleasure than ruining someone's night, especially if it involves Ravens and ISK farmers. With this in mind it was that I sent my covops friend to Ingunn to keep an eye on the locals. Insomnia gets the better of me more and more these days and I need to vent my frustrations in the only way I know how... Violence, lot's and lots of Violence with a side order of Carnage.

My friend in her Cheetah stationed herself in Ingunn and started to scan at regular intervals and it wasn't long before two Ravens appeared on scanner, seemingly in a mission, together. This Intel brought great feelings of happiness to my heart. One of the Raven pilots was someone I had violenced in the past and on one occasion he was most upset.

A probe was dropped but they left system before she could get a hit but it seemed like they went next door to Gultraten so she followed. At this point I was waiting in The Fifth Elephant™, my trusty Sleipnir and the last thing many a Farmer Raven sees before exploding.

The Ravens were indeed in Gultraten and my friend warped to a spot where she could drop a probe and soon I got the call that she had a hit. I warped to the Gult gate and jumped through and entered warp to her position, I landed on top of an acceleration gate and activated it as soon as I could. It was strange that there was no scout on the gate but that didn't matter right now as I was slung into warp.

Bursting out of warp I was greeted by both Ravens warping out, it seems my presence in system was more than enough to spook them. Damn, what now? Both Ravens had docked up, so I left system to see if they would try and run the mission again.

Sometimes my hunches pay off and soon both Ravens undocked, I waited until they had warped back to the mission gate and then jumped in but as I entered my friend reported that they both started aligning for the station again. Damn, I needed to think, I needed to kill and the only way was to recruit some help.

From past dealings with them and a quick scan of various networks it showed that Lang ren had recently been using warp core stabilisers a lot so with this in mind I asked in an Intel channel if anyone with a Heavy Interdiction Cruiser would be willing to fit two Warp Disruption Generators and come play "Introduce the Ravens to their Doom" with me. Colonel Kurtz replied to the affirmative and made his way over to Gultraten while I stayed in Ingunn.

Both Ravens had undocked so I told Krusty to warp to my friend but hadn't noticed the mission gate had disappeared until he landed... Damn. However the Ravens had not left system and seemed to be running another mission so my friend dropped another probe and soon got a hit, she warped in but got uncloaked on the acceleration gate, in full view of one of the Ravens, she tried to bump him so he couldn't warp but the Cheetah isn't very good at that. Both Ravens warped out before Krusty could get there but if anything I believed they would be back so my friend waited, with Krusty at a safespot aligned to her position. Lo and behold they did return and the go was given, Krusty warped his Broadsword in and activated the gate, I had warped to the Gult gate and would wait until he had them both tackled and soon he confirmed that both were trapped.

I jumped in and warped straight to the acceleration gate, activated it and was slung into the deadspace, I burst out of warp with both Ravens engaging Krusty's Broadsword but one thing I know about that ship is that it can take a helluva beating, I locked and engaged Lang ren, he was already deep in armour from Krusty's onslaught, I just added the icing on the cake, he exploded and our attention turned to his friend, who to be quite honest was in some serious trouble, his Raven crumpled under our combined fire and he was too slow to warp his escape pod out, another corpse for "the Morgue"

I was stoked, two kills, well executed and much thanks and love to Colonel Kurtz for the massive assist in making it happen. I headed back to Gusandall on a high, this definitely made my night and hopefully I would be able to get some sleep... But only after the adrenaline wears off.

The unfortunate farmer.

No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man)

I walked into the hangar, the lights were out, a strange thing as I'm sure I left them on. I had left the hangar last night in a bit of a mood as one of my computer systems had crashed after a software update so I had to rebuild the database from scratch. I left the lights on, I'm sure I did.

I had gone out this morning to get some more work done on my tattoo, it's progressing nicely but a lot more work to get done. I was in a better mood, mainly from the adrenaline but I wanted to get out into the black and stir up some trouble.

I found the light switch after taking a detour around some loot that Keira has been meaning to move for a while, the lights pulsed into action and I was surprised to see the loot was gone, Keira's Claymore was docked and hooked up to some refuelling rigs. I walked around the Claymore to where my Rifter was docked and was suprised to see Keira grinning as I approached.

"I have a suprise for you" she said.

Really now, what could it be?

"You finally moved the loot and sold it?" I said

"That's not it genius. Seeing as how you passed 1000 kills I thought I'd grab something from our old highsec base that you could use"

She pulled the tarp off the nose of something that looked like a Stabber or Vagabond but wasn't.

"It's a Republic Fleet Stabber dummy" she blurted out.

Wow, that's really cool, I kind of remember her mentioning one gathering dust in highsec but never gave it a second thought. The Fleet Stabber was a beauty and I got on board to check it out and start loading weapons and mods. It's different from the standard Stabber and her heavier cousin the Vagabond but different in a good way.

I got her loaded and started doing systems checks but what she really needed was a name...

A name...

Flubber it shall be.

So Flubber and I undocked and headed to Eifer where I hoped to get some blood on her. Hanging about in my usual spot I waited...

And waited.

Eventually a target arrived in a belt and I initiated warp. I burst out of warp right on top of a Thrasher and went through the routine of locking, tackling and shooting the everliving shit out of it. It exploded in a satisfying flash and it was only moments after that I recognized the name of the pilot, a new resident of the Independence channel. Oh well, it's not like the first time I've shot an Independence resident. The very first being my good friend and accomplice flashfresh, who also just happens to be the founder of the Independence channel.

Independence is a great channel to talk to like minded people and has some good folk but does not guarantee safety.

I headed back towards Gusandall, not the most spectacular maiden kill for a new ship but blood none the less. As I flashed out of warp on top of the Gus gate there was a Stabber moving towards it, a better target and more of a match for Flubber. I wasn't too comfortable with fighting under sentry fire at this time so I targetted and tried to bump him, maybe getting him to agress but alas it didn't work, he jumped into Gus, I followed. He warped straight towards the Ingunn gate and I followed. A Hurricane piloted by an old friend also gave chase but we narrowly missed him at the Ingunn gate and jumped through to follow. He warped off again as I was too far away for a point but followed him in warp to the Gultraten gate where I engaged, safe in the knowledge that sentry fire would be shared by my accomplice in the Hurricane. The Stabber went down as I aligned to warp out, picking a random planet as my warp point. The sentries were eating me apart and I entered armour just as the Stabber exploded, I immediately hit warp to get Flubber out of harms way.

Thanks go to Redbad for the assist, most appreciated, although it later became apparent he was more interested in killing a Fleet Stabber than a vanilla one :P

Now this is where things take a bizarre turn, I burst out of warp at the planet and made preperations to warp to a safespot when three Imicus frigates warped to my position.

Well now, what have we here? A present for moi?

I targetted the nearest frigate and opened up, all the while locking the other two. After what seemed like an age the first lock resolved and I tackled and opened up, it exploded with such force that my tackling systems still thought it was there, it took them a moment too long to recalibrate and the other two warped out.

Damn I thought to myself, what rotten luck... As if.

I approached the wreck and opened it up, oh my, I knew today was special but this is too much. Some nice implants which will fetch a pretty penny and fuel our criminal enterprise further.

I headed back to Gus and docked up, a succesful maiden voyage for Flubber, no epic fights but ISK was made, the cornerstone of our business. Keira should be happy, the corp wallet looks healthy and we are well stocked with all sorts of violence. All in all, things are pretty damn shiny.

School of Hard Knocks

The trouble with being a god is that you've got no one to pray to.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Small Gods)

There's something therapeutic about being in space, a peace that overcomes the day to day stress of living in a space station. So much junk has accumulated over the past few months, the hangar littered with loot from various acts of Piracy. Keira really needs to move this stuff to Rens, the ISK from sold loot is always welcome. I stub my toe as I stumble out of the corner that is my home, my desk could use a clean too, loads of paperwork that needs sorting from hangar rental to ship repairs.

It never ends... but there is one way to forget this stupidity, oh yes, you know what that is?
Random acts of indiscriminate violence and no better ship than my favourite Rifter.

Class is in session

First stop, Eifer and the start of "Introduction to Lowsec and PvP 101" classes for the day.

A Rifter and Thrasher pilot sufficiently educated left me sitting at a safespot feeling good about myself when I started to track a Rupture, there was a Crow in the general direction piloted by a friend. Well as is my way I tracked him down to a planet and warped in to see the Crow orbiting the Rupture... over 100km away. Well darn, guess I'd just mosey on over and see if I could add some Rifter violence to the mix. I hit my MWD...

Double you tea eff! I still had an afterburner fitted from some plex hunting a few weeks back. Oh well, slow and steady I closed the distance, until I was within range and I added my Barrage rounds to the dance, eventually getting a web down on the Rupture. An interesting fight but the Rupture pilot had taken a lot of damage from the Crow, not being able to repair it's armour because of the buffer setup. The Crow pilot was easy soloing him but I'm Kane Rizzel, I like to shoot stuff.

Introduced another Thrasher to the wonders of lowsec later and then safed up to wait out my GCC, an interesting start to the festivities.

I headed back to Gusandall and docked up as I had planned to meet some people for lunch later and could use a bit of sleep. I slumped down in my bunk, there will be more wanton destruction, oh yes, there will be more.

Everyone is a student

Following a good lunch and enough coffee to really put me on edge it was once again into the black. Didn't have to wait long before getting my first kill in the shape of a Rifter I was tracking.

Whilst tracking the Rifter I had spotted a Vagabond enter Gusandall, I waited out my GCC and docked up to board something a little more suitable... A Rupture.
Not the best match up as I would be at a speed disadvantage and the pilot was experienced from the little data I was able to gather but I wanted some fun and boy did I get it.

I warped to a belt and waited. The belt I chose had a dense array of asteroids which would make navigation a touch difficult for the Vaga pilot. I didn't have to wait long as he warped in at 50km, smart move and one any pilot who flies a ship that needs to dictate range should do. He closed very quickly, over 5km/s and started to engage, I locked and started manoeuvring to intercept, metal straining as my Rupture banked sharply. This was going to be interesting. The Vaga pilot launched tech 2 Warrior drones and they screeched across the space towards me, his 220s spitting out round after round of Barrage, stripping away my shields but I wasn't too concerned as I was getting closer to intercepting, getting closer to getting an overloaded web down. My armour was creeping into the red, he was doing very good damage, all the while my guns unable to track due to his superior speed. My armour had failed, the fat armour plate I had fitted stripped away, my ECM drones not being able to catch him, I cursed myself for not changing them to Warrior IIs but I was in a hurry.

Getting closer now.

Just as my armour totally failed and my structure started taking damage I got my web activated, slowing him down enough to close in and let my guns introduce rounds of Republic Fleet EMP rounds into his hull.

Unfortunately I ran out of structure before I could do significant damage, Oya Loca IV™ exploding violently in the Gusandall sky. I warped my escape pod out in a hurry and exchanged "Good Fight" in local. It was a good fight, especially for me, even though I lost. I like challenges like this, they allow you to judge yourself a lot better and judged I was.

The rookie lesson

A while later Intel was passed down about a Cyclone in a belt, in Eifer. It seemed to be a slow day for most as a whole host of Pirates declared their intent to introduce the pilot to various forms of ordinance. There was talk of some soloing it with cruisers. I of course took it one step further and said I would bring a Reaper.

Yes, you read that right, a Reaper. By the time I had docked and boarded "LOL ROOKIE" the Rupture had been tackled and engaged, the guys said they would wait for me to get there before further violencing the Cyclone.

I warped in, right on top of the Cyclone, locked, tackled, launched my drone and opened up with my two guns. The Cyclone was going down hard, no match for my Reaper, the last of it's structure vanishing in the time it takes to make a cup of tea, it exploded and bits of Cyclone rained upon my Reaper. I started locking the pod but it was vaporised by a smartbomb from a Battleship that joined the party.

I had a good laugh and started looking for other targets I could Reap but alas none were to be found.

About this time of the evening the usual blobs start moving through, so I headed back to Gus and docked up for dinner and a smoke.

Recess

A full stomach and a dose of nicotine later I was once again in my Rifter hunting for clients and oh boy did one come by, a Rifter pilot by the name of Rude Guy. I started tracking him through the belts and eventually caught him, a good but short Rifter vs Rifter duel ensued in which I relieved Rude of his precious ship.

I warped to a safespot to wait out my criminal timer when I spotted Rude back in local, in a Thrasher this time. Oh goody, repeat customer. I tracked him once more and soon found him, tackled and opened up, another short fight but a valuable lesson for Rude. I grabbed loot and once more warped to a safe.

Another Rifter pilot had entered Gusandall and was doing the rounds and I casually followed him until I warped in on top of him, lock 'n pop he went, the pod being snagged in an instant. Scanner shows Rude is back yet again in a Rifter so I made the usual adjustments to my scanner as I tracked him. Warped in but was unable to lock him down as he warped out. He did however warp back in range and I started to close the 50 odd km to him.

AAAARGGGHHHH, that stupid afterburner is still fitted. Once again I slowboated towards my mark, he was very quick, close to 3km/s but he got too close and was webbed and scrammed, his Rifter evaporated in the blink of an eye.

Another succesful class and an end to a long day.

Questions for teacher

Some people have asked me why I fly Rifters as often as I do? Why don't I use a battleship to Pirate in?
Surely there's more ISK in hitting bigger targets? Well, yes and no. Yes, the ISK from battleship loot is more, however losing a battleship hits the wallet a lot harder.
Flying smaller ships is a lot more economical and if you want to make money as a Pirate it's all about the bottom line.

The small amounts gathered here and there from small scale solo Piracy add up, like I said at the beginning of tonight's adventure, there's a lot that has accumulated over the recent past.

Small scale combat is also a lot more fun in my not so humble opinion, being able to manoeuvre in an engagement is great, the feeling of piloting is awesome. Flying a battleship always made me feel like I was swimming in molasses on a cold day.

Another reason is that you're also more likely to find targets if you're in something unassuming, they won't run to highsec or dock up if they spot a Rifter or Rupture on scanner, in fact it's more likely they will fancy their chances and all this leads to more fights, more fights equals more fun and that's what being a Pirate is really all about.

Ink, ISK and Inebriation

Thunder rolled. ... It rolled a six.

-- (Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!)

Well... achieved another milestone today, nothing much in the way of action but according to BattleClinic I have over ONE THOUSAND KILLS! They came courtesy of a Merlin and Rifter duo that I was tracking, not much to write about the fights, I was in my Jaguar when I warped in on them, killed the Merlin and pod as the Rifter warped out. I would later catch the Rifter and her pod whilst in my own Rifter.

In other news, Keira and our sneaky friend ran a 5/10 DED Drone complex early this morning, I was in no state to Pirate as I had a bit too much Bourbon at the club earlier and by too much I mean I couldn't feel my fingers. Some very nice ISK was made and should fund us nicely for a while.



New tattoo started last Monday, two and a half hours under the needle and another two sittings to go before it's done.

I'm going to kill you, you do know this?

DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, said Death. JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH.

-- (Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens)

A Rifter, seemingly innocuous bounces the belts in Gusandall, it's hard to scan him down as he constantly moves. What the hell is he doing? He's not ratting as I warp to one or two belts where he looked to have been and the Angel Cartel rats are still doing their thing, no wrecks, just a belt and no Rifter. I take a moment to start to study his pattern and try to warp ahead of him.

I burst out of warp into an empty asteroid belt and wait, I prime my tackling gear and just as expected the Rifter warps in... 100clicks away, I swing my Rifter around and punch the MWD, acceleration barely felt in my capsule but I hit just over 3km/s. The kilometres count down as I close and he starts to move away, my MWD working over capacity as it starts to overheat, my tackling gear set to overheat as I want every bit of range I can muster. I close very quickly now and in an instant am right on top of him, my lock resolves and all systems kick in, He locks back but does not engage... strange... and then he warps off...

STAAAAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBBBBBSSSSSSS!!!!!! I shout in local comms channels

My left hand starts to throb from punching the command console, the Rifter warps to the station at 100km and just sits there.

Well, this is annoying, I've had a bad day, it's hot, need to get the enviroment controls sorted but first I'm going to dock. I message ahead for my deck crew to ready a 2 point warp scrambler, I was now determined to catch this pilot or my name isn't Kane Rizzel.

It takes only moments for the guys to fit the equipment and I once again undock, Gusandall and Eifer having seen some action earlier as the locals clashed with some other Pirates. The blobs were moving through, an early start to the weekend but I can be so narrow minded at times and this one was such a time.

Rifter. Must. Die!

I sit at a safespot and start to study his movements once again, he's changed, more erratic, might have something to do with a Hawk chasing him. I sit and watch my scanner, narrow arcs sweeping Gusandall's night sky as I try and piece together a pattern. The Hawk has stopped chasing him and he starts his original course, I warp one ahead and wait at 50km.

Damn I'm good, he warps in at 100 once more and now only 50 clicks to close. By now Keira has returned from Amarr space where she has taken a delivery of some significance to NovaKane Inc. She has boarded her Claymore and moved to a Command safespot. My friend in her covops is sitting high above the station feeding me intel.

With Keira's command bonuses I'm on top of the Rifter in seconds, my 2 point warp scrambler kicks in as lock resolves, my guns spin up... HAHAHAHA, I have you know...

Where'd he go?

Oh for fuck's sake, he has at least two warp core stabs and you all just know how I respond to that... don't you?

My right hand joins my left hand in throbbing, that poor command console is going to need some repairs, but at least it's gotten slightly cooler, that last punch scaring the enviromental controls into action.

So, three low slots on a Rifter, at least two stabs, maybe three, Kane was angry and this adversarry was going to die.

I once again docked and had the crew fit another two point scram in place of my stasis web, unfortunately I ran into fitting issues and it wouldn't load properly. Mmm, think Kane, this guy needs to die, you need at least 4 points to make it so, so I ordered my crew to rip out the gyrostabiliser and that allowed me to fit and power the second scram.

Undocking once again I'm keenly looking at the intel being fed to me from high above the station, it seems he's continued his same pattern, I warp straight off to a safespot as the stations sentries have a problem with me, that being they want to shoot me dead.

I listen as my friend reports in and I start to move into position, two jumps ahead I warp in at 70km in case he changes to 50. Lo and behold he warps in at 100 once more and I'm there to greet him.

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition... uhm... I mean 4 points of warp scrambler, Keira's bonuses giving me a massive speed boost and extra range on the scrams, I'm on top of him in the flash of an eye, my lock is quick and sure, my scrams kick in, a beautiful green glow from both assuring me he's staying put, my guns and rocket launcher spit evil death upon his Rifter.
It explodes in a satisfying light display. A wry smile creeps across my face as my systems lock his pod down.

Kane Rizzel > warp core stabs are bad mkay

My guns spin up and a fresh corpse is added to the Morgue.

The killmail is very curious and confuses me a bit but it's still a kill.

Let this be a lesson to you, if at first I don't succeed, I'm going to come back and get you.

I dock up, my hands throbbing, enviromental control has kicked the bucket again and I need some air, could use a smoke and a drink too.