The Offer

You did something because it had always been done, and the explanation was "but we've always done it this way." A million dead people can't have been wrong, can they?
-- (Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant)

When made an offer you can't refuse, you have a few options, you either accept the offer, or you decline the offer, simple really, sometimes you might haggle for a better offer, but, once the offer has been accepted, don't renege, it's considered rude.

I pride myself on having honoured every single ransom I have ever offered, even on occasion having refunded ISK after some trigger happy accomplice got their jollies mid negotiation.

So. when an Ishtar and Tengu are spotted running the lucrative Angel Red Light District in Gusandall, all sorts of machinations are put into gear.

They are probed out within 30seconds of probes hitting space and my accomplice is already on the acceleration gate when I undock The Fifth Elephant™, a Sleipnir class field command ship.

Sleipnir

Name: Sleipnir
Hull: Cyclone
Role: Field Command Ship

Command ships are engineered specifically to wreak havoc on a battlefield of many. Sporting advanced command module interfaces, these vessels are more than capable of turning the tide in large engagements. Field command ships are geared more towards out-and-out combat than their fleet command counterparts, though both ships can hold their own in battle.

Developer: Boundless Creation

Boundless Creation's ships are based on the Brutor tribe's philosophy of warfare: simply fit as much firepower onto your ship as possible. Defense systems and electronics arrays therefore tend to take a back seat to sheer annihilative potential.

Battlecruiser Skill Bonus: 5% bonus to Medium Projectile Turret rate of fire and 7.5% bonus to Shield Booster effectiveness per level

Command Ships Skill Bonus: 5% bonus to Medium Projectile Turret damage and 10% bonus to Medium Projectile Turret falloff per level

Role Bonus: 99% reduction in Warfare Link module CPU need

I warp to the gate and activate it, Keira is in position, Interdicition Maneuver II link active, my tackle overloaded, a massive boost in range as I would need it because the gates are far apart, they're not in the first room, microwarp drive active as I make all haste to the second gate, activated as I enter range and hurtled through to the next room of deadspace. They're sitting 45clicks away, I overheat MWD and close, locking both of them up, Tengu warps out before it resolves but I'm pleased to see a lock on the Ihstar, looooong point goes green and I close, a flight of Zerker IIs start to chase me down but the Ishtar is doomed, I hero tank hoping this would encourage the Tengu to come back but it never does, as the Ishtar explodes, the Pod is tackled and terms offered:



He accepts and transfers the isk, 90 million short, negotiations have ceased and I add his corpse to my collection. I refund the ISK, I should have considered it a donation but I have some weird fucked up sense of honour, don't ask, I can't explain it.

Freak

Quote #458.

"Chain letters," said the Tyrant. "The Chain Letter to the Ephebians. Forget Your Gods. Be Subjugated. Learn to Fear. Do not break the chain -- the last people who did woke up one morning to find fifty thousand armed men on their lawn."
-- (Terry Pratchett, Small Gods)

"A GILA ON SCAN IN EIFER, WAKE THE FUCK UP, I HAVE HIS POSITION, ANGEL RED LIGHT DISTRICT"

I board Sgt Detritus, a Harbinger class battle cruiser and head on over, jump into Eifer, warp to my associate and warp into the complex.

The Gila pilot greets me in a strange tongue, but then speaks common to me.

Brian D'Illusion > СВОЛОЧ
Brian D'Illusion > please Harbinger
Brian D'Illusion > leave me alone

He warps out before I can get in range of my tackle. Well, I'm not here to just chillax, so I warp to a safe spot off scan from the complex and wait for my associate to report the Gila back at the gate. He does go back to the gate, greed a prime motivator in the universe and I warp back to the complex.

Brian D'Illusion > Harb
Brian D'Illusion > u think u smart?
Brian D'Illusion > Please leave me alone

He warps out as soon as I come out of warp and heads to highsec, I take this as my cue to go back to Gusandall and grab something that the Gila pilot might find a bit more palatable, A RUPTURE.

I head on back to Eifer and jump in just as the Gila pilot does the same, but by this time, my cousin Kenny has started to run the complex in his Tengu

EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Eifer
Brian D'Illusion > ffs
Brian D'Illusion > give me back plex
Kane Rizzel > come and take it

I try tempt the Gila to warp in and engage, but I think my enthusiasm may have made him even more weary of my intentions.

Brian D'Illusion > ffs
Brian D'Illusion > i hope someone pod u
Brian D'Illusion > as sson as possible
Kane Rizzel > it could be you
Brian D'Illusion > kidding me?
Brian D'Illusion > 6 years agaisnt low 1 year player
Kane Rizzel > don't come to lowsec if you're gonna cry like a little girl
Kane Rizzel > your ship is superior to mine, I'm in a Rupture
Brian D'Illusion > if i have more money for ship without fear of destroing it
Brian D'Illusion > againd kidding me
Brian D'Illusion > on scan i see tengu with rupture
Kane Rizzel > the Tengu won't get involved
Brian D'Illusion > harbinger?
Kane Rizzel > if you win you can have the plex, until then the Tengu is running it
Kane Rizzel > I'm in a rupture, you didn't want to fight the harbinger so I changed
Brian D'Illusion > ofc
Brian D'Illusion > nice try
Kane Rizzel > your loss, Tengu is going into second room already
Brian D'Illusion > choke with it
Brian D'Illusion > freak

And on that note he left Eifer, never to return

Kane Rizzel > that's not very nice
Kenny Rizzel > what a pleasant fella

So no fight, or kill and a few rather choice words about my character :(

I would later engage in a battle of Ruptures with Dian Lung of The Black Rebel Rifter Club.
It was a close range brawl, in very similar fit Ruptures, a few differences I think turned the tide in my favour, plus Dian had loaded Barrage earlier and forgot to change but it was a close fight none the less :)


Thanks for coming down Dian.

Rep it up, before you slap it up

"And Howondaland Smith, Balrog Hunter, practic'ly eats the dark for his tea."
-- Gaspode the wonder dog
(Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures)

A day of mixed feelings, I lost Flubber, again, and Keira lost Feet of Clay, her Claymore command ship, to two well flown Tengus. Working on Replacing Flubber and Keira has already replaced her loss.

But that's not why we are here, life goes on, ships explode and I'm in the business of making others explode before I do. Yet another Tengu was trying to run a complex, this time in Eifer and before you knew it, an associate had the co-ordinates.

Grabbing the most capable ship as soon as I could, I undocked in Sgt Detritus, a Harbinger class battle cruiser, a fearsome machine of death and destruction, I initiate warp and check all systems.

ARMOUR CRITICAL 24%

Along with the armour damage I notice most of the weapons and electronics systems have heat damage.

"Nice one Kane, you're going into battle with half a ship

Kane Rizzel > oh christ, going after a tengu with a quarter armour



I enter Eifer as systems were primed to jump as I landed on the stargate in Gusandall (I know you can abort the jump but time was off the essence here)

Well, half a ship was better than no ship, so I warp to my associate as fast as Sgt Detritus could align. All the while my associate is checking that the mark was still inside the plex with her directional scanner.

I land on the acceleration gate and initiate warp, moments later exiting inside the complex.

As luck would have it and I was going to need a lot more in the next few moments, the Tengu was only 8km away as I landed on grid, fortuitous indeed as the merest warm breath might have melted my tackle. Systems primed, locked, cocked and open fire.

It takes the Tengu pilot a moment to figure out what is happening but when he does he opens fire, we trade blows, his shields dipping slowly but surely but my meager armour already evaporating under salvo after salvo of heavy missiles.

Do I dare overheat the pulse lasers? Take a chance? I've been lucky so far in this fight, but luck might turn and with no guns I'd either be dead or helpless to kill him forcing me to warp away with my tail between my legs.

I am Kane Rizzel!

I overheat like a motherfucker, shouting at my drones to spur them on, every last ounce of damage is needed as Sgt Detritus starts to vent fuel and atmosphere into space, the combination of the two bursting into flames before being extinguished by the vacuum, but I'm hurting, his shields disintegrate and the Tengu is not much longer for this 'verse. He explodes, a mighty explosion, a satisfying explosion.

I warp off, the loot safely retrieved and a satisfying if slightly nerve racking kill.

In other news, I've started flying a new class of battleship, will take a little getting used to as range is an issue and I've not truly tested her but she has some kills scratched on her hull already.

Edit: Just had an amazing fight with the Megathron, so I'm here to regale you with awesomeness.

There are some new neighbours taken up residence in Hrondedir and I've tussled with them a few times, stirring the hornets nest so to speak, mainly picking them off in complexes and anomalies. Seems my efforts to get a reaction out of them has succeeded.

A lone Typhoon in an anomaly, screams bait as I had watched them gather a sizeable force earlier to camp the Eifer gate, to no avail.

So... Bait!

I wanted to test the Mega and see if I liked it, an associate had already located it, set up the warpin and told me it was aligned to the station, I undock and warp to her.

I come out of warp 5 clicks in front of the Phoon and engage, drop sentry drones and open fire.

Phoon engages back, tackles me and trap is sprung, local spikes and I see Arazu, Hound, Hurricane and Falcon now in the mix. The all hit grid and a swarm of ec-300 drones engulf my Mega. I pulse the smartbomb and the pressure eases but the Falcon is well and truly messing with my targeting electronics.

I pop an exile booster and continue to tank like a Boss, not being able to shoot anything but doing damage none the less as my drones are still engaging the Phoon and my smartbomb explodes another wave of ec-300s.

One of the locals asks me if anything is going down? I calmly reply "Me"
The locals that are awake x up, a Legion, Loki and Falcon join me in mighty battle, but as they hit grid, the hostiles warp out, leaving my Megathron on fire, deep into structure, no cap boosters left but still in one piece.

The Typhoon explodes from my sentry drone onslaught and I was curious as to why he never warped out, only to see the answer in the killmail.

A cyno? I was Black Ops dropped, managed to tank them all enough for friends to bail me out and still managed a kill, FUCKING RESULT. I initially thought I had been login trapped.

An associate would later probe the Hound out, which was destroyed, the pod probed and popped for good measure



Thanks to RealZonk, Xylorn and Xintri for saving my ass :D
The logs have been parsed and this is the story of the fight:
Total Damage done to your targets: 69,300.2
Total Damage done to you: 77,776.4

•To view the images in all their glory, right click and open link in new tab

[OOC] I will also be around a lot less as I'm back to work tomorrow after a months R&R

Ransom ignored, ship destroyed, bad loot drops, good loot drops and capital deployment

Greebo's technique was unscientific and wouldn't have stood a chance against any decent swordmanship, but on his side was the fact that it is almost impossible to develop decent swordmanship when you seem to have run into a food mixer that is biting your ear off.
-- (Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad)

Mere seconds after I tackled a Kestrel at planet 3 in Gusandall...

Sneaky Friend > Probes out, I'll have a warp in for you in a few seconds
Kane Rizzel > Warp in for what?
Sneaky Friend >The Tengu on scan! You've not spotted it?
Kane Rizzel > Not really, no, I was busy tracking this Kestrel
Commando Jaxx > Hey Kane, you want to help clear up some litter in Gus?
Kane Rizzel > Litter?
Commando Jaxx > An offline POS that some folk tried to set up
Kane Rizzel > Yeah, you're breaking up, must be solar flares bouncing off Uranus or something
Commando Jaxx > Haha, very funny, I know you hate POS shots but there isn't much else to do
Kane Rizzel > Speak for yourself, I'm chilling... Killing... And just about to make this Tengu's day a lot more interesting.

I had docked my Rifter with the loot from the Kestrel, nothing spectacular but probably worth something melted down and sold to the bottom feeders in one of the trade hubs. It only took a few seconds to board Flubber and head on out, as my sneaky friend had already got a warp in and confirmed the target still inside what was a 5/10 rated exploration complex.

Kane Rizzel > Groovy, let's rock

I activate the gate, everything overloaded in case the target is out of range of tackle but as I burst out of warp he has conveniently not strayed too far away and it's a quick pulse of my propulsion mod before I'm in range and start firing with the Tengu firmly scrammed and webbed.

I attempt to open comms to deliver my terms:

Kane Rizzel > Good evening sir, might I offer you the one time offer of a ransom of 750meellion ISK and you are free to go on your merry?

...

Kane Rizzel > 750mil, nice and cheap... Or you could eject and save yourself some schooling.

...

Kane Rizzel > Very well then, fire at Will it is then, I do feel sorry for Will, he gets shot at all the bloody time.

This is how the terms would have been offered had the hapless Tengu pilot answered the convo request, as it was, I settled for the kill and it happened without any fuss.

The Loot gods didn't smile on me as the most valuable item went up in smoke with the rest of the ship, but I had the loot safely secured in my Cargo and then asked my Cousin if he'd like to finish the 5/10.

Kane Rizzel > Hey cuz, you want to make some ISK
Kenny Rizzel > Always :)

So I gave him the details and left him to it. I joined Jaxx at the POS, set up by an old friend of sorts, Kerjin.

Our two Battleships were going to take an age to drop the tower, even as it's defences were all dormant, so yet another call to a family member went out and Keira agreed to deploy the corp Moros to aid in the take-down and make it go by a damn side quicker. Along the way we were joined by an alliance mate of Jaxx' but after three siege cycles the tower vanished from Gusandall space forever.

All the while Kenny had completed the plex and scored the very same afterburner that got destroyed in the Tengu., 400 odd mil in our pockets :D

Life is good :)

OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS KILLED KENNY!

In the Beginning there was nothing, which exploded.
-- (Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies)

It's not always a pleasure to lose ones hard earned spaceship, although I take great pleasure in relieving others of theirs.

What goes around comes around though and karma has a funny way of paying back whatever misdeeds one may have done.

A quiet afternoon in the Evanatter pocket of Heimatar saw my cousin and associate Kenny Rizzel doing some plex work in neighbouring systems that were probed out by another associate. On his way back to Emolgranlan he reported a Myrmidon battlecruiser sitting on the Gusandall gate in Eifer. Being a PvP novice and in a rather expensive Tengu, he decided we would try and bait the Myrm into action. He locked him up but the Myrm didn't bite.

I undocked in a Harbinger and made best speed to the Eifer gate as Kenny had decided to fire ze missiles at the Myrm.

Myrm was at half armour when I jumped in and instantly engaged and it was then that local filled up with the Myrmidon's support. Kenny was at good range but I was in it till the death. The Myrmidon went down, I switched to one of the Hurricanes, Kenny bails as a Taranis starts in on him. Fair enough, he is not set up for combat. I hit the hurricane hard but a swarm of ECM drones wreak havoc with my sensors and I lose the ability to target my aggressors.

My Harbinger goes down, good fight, if a little one sided, I get the pod out sharpish to the safety of an alliance controlled POS in system.

Kenny has his very first Global Criminal Countdown but has no safespots in system so I tell him to warp to my position.

"Is it safe"

Of course it is, you're a Rizzel, you're all blue to the alliance.

He warps to my position after entering the forcefield password and bounces off the shields.

"Kane?"

Hold on little buddy, I'm just busy...

"KANE! THE FUCKING POS HAS ME LOCKED, SCRAMMED AND NEUTED!"

Double you tea eff mate?

Kenny is not able to get away as the Alliance controlled POS reduces his mighty Tengu to nothing more than some debris in space.

I watch on helplessly as my cousin is obliterated by friendly fire.

OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS KILLED KENNY!

Yes, that was a 2billion ISK Tengu that got evaporated by friendly fire. Kenny took it surprisingly well, just asking that anything that survived be returned to him. Myself? I was a bit more upset, I've only recently given up smoking (5days now \o/) and this wasn't helping my mood. I don't mind losses in combat, whether it being blobbed, baited or ECM'd (OK, y'all now I hate ECM) but this was a very hard pill to swallow.

I headed back to Gusandall and docked up, said sorry to Kenny who had just arrived at his HQ in Emolgranlan and decided to take a rather long walk to clear my mind.

I could really use a cigarette but need to stay strong.