Monday, 24 November 2008


The world is made up of four elements: Earth, Air, Fire and Water. This is a fact well known even to Corporal Nobbs. It's also wrong. There's a fifth element, and generally it's called Surprise.

-- (Terry Pratchett, The Truth)
This is my Broadsword, let me show you it

Lights flicker to life as I enter the hangar, seems Keira has neglected to move loot again but no matter, today is not the day to worry about such minor issues, today is a day to celebrate.

I look over my array of ships and pick a Rifter, time to pay a visit to Eifer. My head is a bit tender as I just had some new implants installed into this clone and they kind of dulled the senses but that too will pass, I was eager to get out into the black and do some old fashioned Piracy.

Eifer was dead but news had come through of a Megathron in an adjacent system doing a mission. I hurried back to Gus to grab Guards! Guards! my Broadsword. It is a well known fact that many lowsec mission runners fit warp core stabilisers and nothing ruins their day like a Broadsword to the head.

My friend in her covops was dispatched to probe him out as the gang was forming. She got a hit with her first sweep and had soon vectored us in to the mission gates. Yes, that's not a mistake, there were three gates going in different directions but she used her on-board scanner to determine he was in the direction of the Alpha gate. I jumped in and warped to the gates, landing 17km from the Alpha gate I activated my afterburner and closed as the rest of the small fleet assembled flashed out of warp.

I activate the gate and... Nothing, an automated message appears on my HUD saying it is locked and requires a special key to activate. Damn, what now, well the other two gates were clear of wrecks and we assumed he'd have to return here to use them so we had the covops and a recon stay put as we left system or warped to deep safespots.

News of a Fleet Issue Tempest in Gusandall got the pulses racing as the small gang, hungry for a kill closed in, he was trapped and was soon collared at a gate but made the mistake of aggressing before jumping, making it now impossible to get away as we tore him apart. It wasn't a very memorable fight but a kill is a kill, we didn't even have a chance to ransom as his armour and hull vaporized under our assault.

Meanwhile, in a system right next door the Megathron had returned so I made all haste to get back in there. It seemed he had docked for a while but our scouts reported him back on scanner, I got into position in system and waited for him to warp in. Our scouts gave the call as he warped in and I initiated warp of my own to their position. Warp trails streamed off my Broadsword as my systems showed I landed right on top of him. Tackling systems primed in warp went active as my lock resolves.

Kane Rizzel > hello there precious
Zenithil > Hi
Zenithil > You guys willing to trade?

Mmm, he wanted a ransom so it was offered and we each made a nice little bit of ISK for our trouble. We left him to his business and went on our merry. I returned to Gus and checked in at the station but was soon back out in the black as a Maelstrom was tackled on the Gus gate in Eifer, I raced there and we vaporized him as he didn't answer the ransom request.

Apparently I can't solo two Ruptures

Back in a Rifter and back in Eifer I had scanned out two Ruptures, not in the same spot but definitely together as they were in the same corp. I warped in to where one was and engaged, I had taken his shields out as his friend came in and my Rifter didn't last long, I warped my escape pod out towards Gus as I was going to fetch Flubber™, my Fleet Stabber. I came back and they were bouncing safes so I offered a 1v2 which was never answered. I really wanted revenge for what they did to my wonderful Rifter.

Falcon, meet Flubber™

News comes in of a battlecruiser being engaged in Gusandall and I make haste there, I jump in just as it all kicks off and a rather sizeable gang engages the local Pirates. They had a Falcon and I made a beeline towards it, it was my only target and the thing I wanted to kill most. As I burned towards it, his friends opened up on me, along with the sentries as I had a GCC from my fight against the Ruptures.

Just as I was about to get into warp disruption range he warped out and the rest of the locals disengaged as the hostiles outnumbered and outgunned us. I warped out and docked, setting my hangar crew to knocking out the dents in Flubber™

Roaming Bastards

I get a call from my old friend flashfresh who asks if I want to go on a T1 frigate roam with him and The Bastards. Hells yeah I do, just let me get a new Rifter set up and wait out my GCC and I would be right over. Fellow blogger Mynxee was in gang too along with some other Hellcats members, an honour to fly with the female Pirates of the verse. All in all about 17 assorted frigates to cause havoc amongst the stars.

I headed out to where they were waiting and after a few minutes we set out, not much in the first few jumps but eventually we found a Harbinger Ratting. The swarm of frigates descended on him and proceeded to violence his boat, to such an extent it exploded. His corpse was liberated from the confines of his escape pod in the blink of an eye.

We ran across a Hurricane in the same system and he too met with a sticky end.

Bouncing around we eventually tried to engage a flashy red Abaddon on a station but he docked, more from fright as his overview filled up than any damage he was taking on his massive armour.

Then came the icefield in Oddelulf. A Jaguar and three destroyers engaged us and were all destroyed although we also took some losses.

The roam ran out of steam at this point and I decided to return home and see what was about.

Vexor meet Flubber™

I get a call from my friend in her covops who says she just busted a safespot of a Vexor cruiser. Flubber™ gets another spin in the black as I undock and warp to her position.

I burst out of warp a few clicks off him and close the distance, my lock has already resolved and the warp disruptor is glowing a satisfactory green as it pulses and makes sure he doesn't get away. He's up for a fight as he returns lock and closes, web, scram and drones are set upon Flubber™ as my guns blast massive holes in his armour. He has energy neutralisers and vampires painting a pretty picture across Gusandall's dark hues but it doesn't last long as his armour fails and shortly after so does the structure. Good fight is shared in local comms as he warps his escape pod away from the carnage.

So what's with the celebration?

I sit back in my deck chair in my hangar and reflect on a rather good day, made the more merry by the fact this is my century of blog posts. It's taken a while as I'm not as prolific as some of the other bloggers out there and sometimes my stories might not capture the imagination but I try my best. Over eleven and a half thousand visitors have viewed these stories and whilst it might not compare to some of the more popular blogs, it sure sems a lot to me, not sure why people would want to read about my adventures but it seems to have a following.

As I was writing this I was notified of trespassers in our local 2/10 plex, a Wolf assault frigate and a Coercer destroyer. Maurice™ my Jaguar was just waiting for such an opportunity and I quickly boarded and undocked. Making all haste to the plex gate I burst out of warp hammering the scan button in the direction of it's trajectory, they were still there. Activating the ancient gate I was launched into familiar territory, trails of warp streamed off the Jaguar's beautiful hull as she lands right on top of the Coercer, guess it was primary as the Wolf was 30clicks away. The Coercer was going down hard as the Wolf closed, I did the same and as the destroyer was destroyed I switched tackle over and proceeded to introduce the pilot to the colour of his liver. Another trophy for "The Morgue"

I scoop the loot and dock up. Need to take some painkillers as these implants are hurting a bit.
I light a celebratory cigarette and make myself a cup of tea.

It's good to be the King :P

Check out flashfresh's blog for his Pirate blog speedlinking, a one stop resource for all things YARR!


Anonymous said...

Actively choosing to fight two ruptures in a rifter, or some of the other fights you do, you are a maniac :D Certainly the most dangerous of my eve converts to date!

No'Wai said...

id love to join in a t1 frig roam sometime with ym amarr >< usually in hellcats pub if an opening is eve avail, t2 fit if its permitted =p

o also.Awesome storytelling! sounds like a blast except the 2 chickensht stabs

Carole Pivarnik said...

Congrats on your 100th post, Kane. No secret why folks like your blog--it's well written, interesting, and inspiring for those of us love to yarr. I'll let you in on a deep dark groupie secret: during the roam earlier this evening, I was all like "OMG! That is KANE RIZZEL right next to me! RIGHT.FRAKKIN.NEXT.TO.ME!!!" Fun, fun times! I'm tickled to be on a few of the same killmails with you.

Anonymous said...

"and proceeded to violence his boat, to such an extent it exploded."

lol stuff like that is why I love reading these blogs! Well done, Kane, makes me miss New Eden all the more :D

Anonymous said...

He heh, 'grats on the century :) Always a good read! Love the boat violence reference, makes me chuckle

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the 100th blog post and yes, you graced us with your presence. There will be more in the future and a slot will always be open. I agree with Mynxee - your posts are well written with a touch of the Terry Pratchett humour thrown in.

To many of us, you're still the best solo pirate. By a parsec.....and why did you get most of the kill mails last night?